Kampung girl

2004-01-12T22:29:00.000+08:00

A new place

A new place to visit as i continue my journey in this life at http://kksuzi.com/blog/

2004-01-05T16:45:00.000+08:00

Why do I blog at first place?

The sun is shining brightly. The temperature is steaming. It’s hot out there. Really hot. I hope for a rain tonight.

Anyway, enough on weather report.. Today I decide to write on something about this bloging thing. Ever since I star to post my first notes to this blog, I find writing is an addictive hobby I start to develop. So as the temperature I can say boiling myself, I’m sort of thinking Why do I blog at first place? or another question will be Why BLOG?

Well this topic had been written all over the blog exist. Few to be mention...

according to najah as I quote from prodigy, "There comes a point in life where we look back and try to see what we've done. Journals help, but it is not as fun as doing a blog. I started with the intention of focusing my life into manageable segments and tracking my progress as a person. Should I veer too far off, my blog is a permanent reminder what I used to be.”

IreneQ that says something like “ I just wrote more or less whatever came to mind. I didn't write it for anyone in particular to see, and no one knew that I kept a blog.” Another point that interest me will be “ I started to write because people were reading, and so in a way I also began to write for the people who were reading.”

Reason may exist for different situations. When I posted my first notes on “ A WET WEDNESAY MORNING”, I was partially influence and obsessed by some article posted from few blog that I knew at that precise moment and also for a friend of mine. My accident meeting with Blogger begins as I was browsing some of prodigy article and I find this idea of public journal very amazing. When I began to write, sometimes I have so much to be said but sometimes… my words are very limiting. I share my feeling for the past 6 months. Later I realised this one hobby had helped me to see things that I had neglect for the past 25 years of my life; the power of expressing my thought and my feeling.

The last 6 month I tried to ponder my thought, feeling and also point of view using word. I wrote any single thought that emerge out of nowhere in my mind. Things like movies, personal interest, life; some failure and some happy momment, my dad, my promises, dreams and life perception that interest me. I was hoping one day i can write some serious issue going on around me. To comment about every dirty tactics played by the politician or some great things occur or even i might one day just sit in front of my monitor and let my brain exercise to grab one main idea for my thought to be spread. Definitely before that day, i will enjoy this writting hobbies i had and tried to proceed and build a personal out of it. one day!

some link to be share:

Top 20 Definitions of Blogging

SO WHAT'S A BLOG? by debbie weil and much can be read here!

2004-01-05T09:56:00.000+08:00

The Steward of Gondor

Home is behind
The world ahead
And there are many paths to tread
Through shadow
To the edge of night
Until the stars are all alight

Mist and shadow
Cloud and shape
Hope shall fail
All shall fade

2004-01-02T09:58:00.000+08:00

Small Story on Decision Making

Here is a small story on decision making. Please go through the story very carefully to get the sense of it. Which one will you choose?

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track. The train came, and you were just beside the track interchange. You could make the train change its course to the disused track and saved most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way? Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make............

Most people might choose to divert the course of the train,and Sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess. Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place? Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was.

This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.

The friend who forwarded me the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one

"Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right."

p/s: This content is taken from a forwarded email.

2004-01-01T09:25:00.000+08:00

SMALL TOWN GIRL!

I grew up as a small town girl with very small visions and perspective about this wide wide world. As I pass by the Ayer Keroh toll booth yesterday, I had this feeling of missing my small life I used to have. My hometown my not have Malaysia best facilities yet I like my hometown best. My dad small house may not be Malaysia most luxury place to stay yet I still believe that it is a one adorable house rich with memories. My mom flower garden may not be the most beautiful garden as compare to any fantastic garden landscape exist yet I like it best. My mom cook may not be the spectacular dish as serve at other 5-star dinner yet the taste last forever. What ever it is, I like every single thing I used to have back during my life as my mommy small girl. That’s true.

Seeing the image of the world around from the small eye I have, I enjoy the perspective. I adore the feeling. I just love it.

As a small town kid, I had always hoped to study, get my degree and off I go to the big city and begin my life. Today, after I had my one day journey back to my hometown yesterday, I’ve been ambushed with the thought of….
“ I wish I’m still in my small town and enjoying my life as a small town girl.”

Regrets? Well not really… just somehow how far I left my hometown, just how much my heart fill with the joy of living in the big city and just how fast the life in the big city goes… I still want to be back with my small town home, my heart still had this feeling of enjoying my small town life and adore the slow pace of life in my small town.

The day will come when I shall spend my 24 hours of time to the fullest joy life as KAMPUNG GIRL!

2003-12-30T12:46:00.000+08:00

New year resolution

Every time we bid farewell for the existing year and welcome a new fresh year, we always have a set of resolution to guide us throughout the year. This year the trend is same. As the year 2004 is just a breath away. Leaving 2003 with full of memories. This year may not be the best year of my life yet I learn a lot. I might begin 2004 with new job at the same company (due to the fact that I might join business and marketing department soon, if the verbal news is true.) For 2004 I’m hoping for better things to happen.

I want to be a person that do her job and ignore others.

I’m looking to improve my knowledge. May be looking for a master course!

Need to have strong discipline and improve my level of motivational towards life and job. Perhaps changes give me something different to move on!

I want to spend more quality times with my hubby and my mom! Planning for two vacations. One with my mom and my hubby and the second one might be a honeymoon. ( mu hubby and i .. we don't have a honeymoon yet.. so this year we might planning for one than).

Less talking but double up the thinking and listening!

Planning for a get together with my friends. Do some catch up and enjoy the momment! Nana, Nila, Sue shaf ...mieco, labu,pian... care for pot-luck than?

Bye 2003! Welcome 2004!

2003-12-26T15:35:00.000+08:00

Something written for today!

"When you choose not to see, will you stop from looking?”

Sometimes as we move forward in life, there are certain things that come with great powers. I am not talking about the powers-of-three or any extreme super human capability but I’m talking about the power that are pack together with the position entitle. The position being a human in this earth. The position being a leader along the life. The position being a follower. The position being the person you are meant to be. With every post assign, lots of twisted turns occur. Sometimes we tried to acknowledge the junction. But frequently we opt to see through the situation. We ignore! We choose not to see the implication. We prefer not to study the map that displays the end of the junction. We have the resources we waste them. We have the time but drained them away!

However, blinding your eyes might one day may give you the comfort period of life. Perhaps one day.. or even longer. But soon, when you realise … you might have to say things like… Even though I choose not to see that doesn’t meant I can not look. But what can I say I choose not to see and deny the looking perspective I had. At the end, I end up nowhere. I’m lost!

Finally, as 2003 is reaching the end, I conclude this year as one year full of twisted roads that I choose not to see every single of them. And as I sat today, perhaps spending my last Friday in cyberjaya, have I achieve my 2003 expectation? Sorry to say… I had the chance but I chose not study. At the end, I end up nowhere. I wish when I choose not to see I will at least spend a moment of life to look! Somehow I manage to loose them somewhere too!

2003-12-23T10:40:00.000+08:00

Some small thing in life…

Incident 1:

It’s 530 PM. The target is to reach home. Every footstep leads to the lift. The sound of feet feels the air in the hallway. Pressing the button with a couple showing the anxiety to reach home as if the lift would travel faster. Ting… the lift opened. Everybody rushed in. Every single empty space is occupied with every breathing mortal exist at the respective floor. The lift stop at every floor. Sorry dear the lift is full. Still one or two small two-feet man try to sneak in. Finally I reach the 1st floor. What will the person at the front line would do? Turning left turning right…
“Excuse me..” I say. The lady is standing still. Not moving even for a nanometer.
“Excuse me” My voice might be too soft. I raise the volume. People on the right lift are leaving. Me on the left Lift stuck.
“ada orang nak keluar kak.” A friend of hers taps he shoulder.
“Cakap ler…. Nak keluar.” The lady step out of the lift.

rules to be a lift occupant.
“when you are standing at the front line where your nose can touch the door, when the lift stop and the door is open mind to step out for a second to give way for those at the back to exit.”

Incident 2

It’s a one lovely morning. The sun is shinning. I’m sensing some joy and happy moment. As I walked approaching the glass, automatic door, you know the door that will open when it sense your existence within a few cm to the door, the door just won’t open. Luckily I managed to break my footstep. Otherwise I might bang into the door. Hmm… what shall I do? I try to take a few steps back and walk forward. Not working! I try from the left angle… not OK. How about trying on the right? nerghhh still fail. Ok try again. Then come this person. Walking at a very fast mode…. towards the door.. then tadaaa…. open sesame…the door open. I smiled and walked away. I began my day to the door clown!

technology do have favouritism?

2003-12-22T15:40:00.000+08:00

Wish master!

Today is 22 December 2003. You have 9 days before the year expired. As the hours of 2003 expired, you accidentally bump to meet a person known to be your wishmaster. Granting a person wish is their job. Expecting no reward will be the price. Thus, as you were given 3 wishes that this wishmaster will not failed to fulfil, what are your wishes?

What sort of wishes people do have invite my curiosity. I wonder.

2003-12-19T15:58:00.000+08:00

Lord of the ring: Return of the king

So much have been said about the outstanding ending for the trilogy. So many summary and comment can be read all over the net about the movie and its’ trilogy. Scatter all over the net and spread across any available blog, the stories had nicely described from the eye of J.R.R. Tolkien reader and movie fan. Some complains some are just obsessed. Yesterday, I end my 3 years of waiting. The movie…I can say…a one great ending for the trilogy.

This is a story that grab many elements of life exist as mankind.

This is a movie of battle and fight. The struggle to gain freedom. The fight to defence. With beautiful movie technique, the war scene I can say fantastic. Being one person driven by movie, I find the trilogy inspire me. A man fight despite knowing being outnumber. man overcome fear by the name of freedom and human survival..is nicely potray in this movie. The look of fear in the eye of a woman and in face of a hobbit to respond the cry of war. The taste of victory without sacrifice. The pain of loss for every battle.

Aragorn : A day may come... when the courage of men fails. When we forsake our friends... and break all bonds of fellowship... but it is not this day. Whatever happens.. This day... we fight!

It is a story of friendship. The feeling being there for the friend you cares. The friendship of being a protector to another friend of yours just like sam and frodo had. The friendship between two different creatures just the way Gimli and Legolas had. The friendship that will fall apart just for a single temptation as portray by smeagol and Deagol. Many more can be say. Yet few can be write.

gimli: "I never thought I'd die standing next to an elf."
Legolas: "What about standing next to a friend?"
Gimli:"Aye, that I can do."

Return of the King is also a movie of hope. When the doom of day is the only one that conquer the fact of life, we still have hope to believe in. as hope drove each of the character. Seeing the shire is the hobbit dream. Seeing the mankind exist in the world. Hoping the hobbit still survive to finally release the ring.

Aragorn: Not for ourselves, but we can give Frodo a chance.

The trilogy had ended. Perhaps it will be remember as one good movie. Perhaps some disagree. Still I see it as one masterpiece. A one movie that will last for quite sometimes in me; LORD OF THE RING TRILOGY. Perhaps others may have something different?

for more: try reading something here might help. or how about reading here for more.

2003-12-18T10:06:00.000+08:00

2nd wife

Last night I can say a one lovely night. The four us with my mom had our dinner at my brother house in Ampang. Later that night, we had a conversation from light to heavy stuff. One of the topic discuss is about ‘2nd wife’.

I choose to be a listener rather than being part of the talker.One point that grabs my attention is

“ When he turn to another woman, there might always be a reason. Try to identify the incapability and try to overcome them. Otherwise, if he insists to proceed with the 2nd wife then let him go, accept the destiny (redha dengan takdir), never ask for the D-word and wait. One day he may return.”

The ‘2nd wife’ had always been a woman nightmare. Well, too many cases happened when a man turn to another woman for her beauty and special nice treatment that such a young girl could offer to a 40 years old man. Well I can’t say much on that as experience limits my incapability to thoroughly discuss such topic. However what concern me most, the ‘2nd wife’ thing is the most painful thing happened. What worries every typical wife will be…

“We knew each other and from there we built the family together. We share the obligation, responsibility and together we stand by each other. But one day, when everything is stable, you turn to another woman for me being the old lady, a nuisance of your wealthy life and blaming my children for topping up your miserable life that you thought caused by me and my children. If me being ugly, get me a beautician. If me being a nuisance, guide me to be a no more trouble maker of your life and if my children is just burden.. remember… They are yours too. Anak itu rezeki tuhan.

If you are looking for entertainment in life, I can say no more. But I believe, if everyday is an entertainment day for you… you are no longer an entertaining person of my life.”

2003-12-16T11:33:00.000+08:00

DECEMBER 22, 2001; THE DAY

The day is just a beginning
as sharing is part of gain
together we bear the pain
and together our life we paint.

2003-12-12T00:09:00.000+08:00

My dinner topic...

The clock is ticking. Our stomach is drumming for something to digest. Well.. since we both decide not to have dinner at home and we are both reaching the danger zone for hunger, we decide to crash at some nearby shops. Finally, we decide to have a nice dinner at our favourite warung; The food ordered are kerapu pedas, telur bistik, udang goreng special and kailan goring and drinks.. well Sirap limau ... our favorite drinks.

While waiting for the food, we have some tiny observation going on. We talk about this young boy with a very tempting way of eating style. The way he shoved his food to his mouth, how his mouth crunch his food.... Kids... they look cute when they are eating! * Smile *.

Along the way we consumed the waiting moments with some information exchange. About some tiny winny things going on in our life, some small encounter in my nomad job life today and not to forget to share some funny things going on today. Finally I came up with a question. Why do people get married? Tadaaaaa! The one magic question. Do we get married for love? Define love than? What actually love is? How do we know we do really married a person for his/her love? Well I've seen enough cases and read enough stories, about two very loving lovers, getting excited with marriage and accepting the akad and finally one day? getting divorce. The reason... typical... "You know... marriage is about reproducing? we get married to produce a new set of us?but somehow we can't do that..." And the next thing you know, the divorce process. What worse when marriage is not about love and being loyal. It sucks to know that marriage is all about ehem... you know what I'm trying to say. Is that what marriage is all about? Perhaps I'm still stuck somewhere in the fairy tales stories here or perhaps I was sort of roaming alone in this fantasy world of perfect love, but will it be that simple for a marriage to end? Just as simpel as 1,2,3? 30 years of marriage and suddenly one of you thought that the other person you married with is not that romantic and I need the D-letter word here.

For me marriage is a very sacred thing happens in my life. Marriage is not about two people living together. Marriage is about a merge for two families. With that, marriage comes with some serious obligation and responsibility. Conflict occurs due to some possible differences blend with some methods of living. But that's some tiny thing needed to educate us on marriage and responsibility.

Anyway, as I enjoy every single flesh of the fried fish, my mind keep thinking what do others have to say about this?why do people get married now? I wonder?

2003-12-09T15:43:00.000+08:00

My lovely Lunch

"Pounding stomach will crushed your day; grab something before it gets your way."

(image taken from :When jemi blogs! )

The temperature is steaming. The sun is shining brightly. My thirst is pounding my single lane dried throat. What a day... What a day... Since I began my day with a pounding stomach, I decide to end the hunger call. Having no second thought, I steer my one and only car to the nearest coffee shop available. SAN FRANCISCO COFFEE at PUTRAJAYA. Browsing the food display, my mind is rapidly matching the choice of cuisine that fulfils my hunger demand. Think girl.... think really hard.

Enjoying the existing panorama of medan selera next to Masjid Putra, my mind get myself confused. Food selection is important when your stomach is drumming all the way. Wrong choice might invite a twister mood. Since my lunch is about to expired, I decided to grab something simple and nice. Nice means something refer to the luxury taste of cheese. Simple would definitely refer something like easy to eat not as complicated as spaghetti. Hmmm? ok I finally decide to grab one simple menu lasagne with extra cheese and Extreme Chocolate.

Once ordered, the first drop of chocolate taste that flooding my dried thirst is like a drop of water in the dehydrated dessert. As I see drops of water moisten the plastic glass, the cool feeling conquer myself inch by inch. Taking my first bite from the tempting lasagne, I felt the power of satisfaction flooding myself from within. Ah lovely.... I surrender. I made a one lovely choice for a one hungry stomach. Nice choice girl. Absolutely nice.

2003-12-08T17:07:00.000+08:00

A complete Meal!

"A bite of complete meal fulfil a day of hunger. "

Eating just a simple meal with a heart full of appreciation will never deny your satisfactory. As one simple meal served with an endless love, cook with an infinite supply of dedication and prepared from distinguish ingredient of care, you will have an undeniable delicious meal cook ever. Thus, a bite from such a fabulous meal offers you nothing but a one satisfactory stomach. Grab a bite and you knew the feeling.

Thanks for the lovely food served during the jamuan raya.

2003-12-08T10:22:00.000+08:00

WEEKENDS AND JAMUAN RAYA!
Today my office will be having jamuan raya (potluck style). The foods are partially ready by 955. We began with a pack of nasi lemak as we are waiting for the satay and Nasi Tomato. At this moment I’m enjoying my one pack of nasi lemak served with delicious sambal pack with daun pisang… the taste lovely. We also have lontong, rending, ketupat, cakes, fruits and some other titbits. Heheheheh…..

Last weekend, I went back to my hometown. Since my mom 3 girls are back, 3 of us enjoy the Saturday night lying on the bed and share this girls conversation. We chat almost everything! While we were talking, we enjoy the firework show (for celebrating PAK LAH visit to MELAKA) from My mom house veranda. Then we had this delicious bubur terigu daging. While enjoying the terigu cooks with spices and santan, we even persuade our mom to come with us to KL since she’s not feeling well after returned from her 1 month Umrah trip.

On Sunday, we began the day with a set of spectacular food. We had my mom best kuah kacang served with ketupat and also kelapa. (Since I miss her kuah kacang during the raya because she did her umrah during the ramadhan until 4 syawal.). Then we have this Nasi Lemak ( I don’t why but I like my hometown nasi lemak best). We also have this cempedak goreng and to complete our heavy breakfast, my sister cooks macaroni kuah. ( looks like mee bandung except we use macaroni ). Around 10, the 3 girls decide to cook khasidah. It’s a kind of cakes I can say cook using flour, sugar, water fried minyak sapi. It looks like dodol except it’s white in colour. Then we ate the kahsidah with fried onion. Nyum nyum…For lunch we have sate and the lovely epok-epok sayur.

That’s what going back to hometown is all about. FOOD AND FOOD. Mummies 3 girls would normally spend the time cooking and eating. We even tried not to miss the best mee hoon soup in Tengkera, The sweet cold lee chee kang, Hassan Mee goreng, ROTI JOHN and Ikan bakar.

I guess enough about food as my jamuan raya is about to start since the nasi tomato is here. So guys… allow me to enjoy the foooooooooooooooooooood. * Smile *

2003-12-05T14:09:00.000+08:00

Lesson of the day!

“Do not observe others for their mistakes you might overlook yours.”

A sentence to remember as I learnt one great lesson today; be human. Tolerate others and expect no return. To err is human but I shall not acknowledge a person for his/ her incapability (mistakes!). Just bear with them and I shall see this life as one great event. Sorry for hurting you one way or another but I felt relieved for everything is ok between us now. Sorry my friend.

“Do not defend your incapability by connecting other people disadvantage”

A common reaction when your failure being highlight. Accept my mistake and change. Believe in that and implement that.

2003-12-04T11:10:00.000+08:00

GILMORE GIRLS: Ballrooms & Biscotti

I finally got my streamyx installed. The first thing I did last night was downloading tonnes and tonnes of mp3, movies and trailer! The first movie downloaded yesterday is GILMORE GIRLS: Ballrooms & Biscotti. Nudge I watched them this morning from 7AM.

As I watched them this morning there are few highlights that caught my interest. The first hightlight is about sookie pregnancy scene and Jackson refusal to know whether the baby is a he or a she.

Jackson:“Hey, in the old days, the guys would pace back and forth in the waiting room until a pretty nurse in a nice white outfit would come out and say, "Congratulations - it's a 'insert your chosen sex here'." Ricky Ricardo didn't know, Dick van Dyke didn't know, and by gum, if it was good enough for Rick and Dick, it's good enough for me

Luke cruise, Marriage and the relationship issue with the lawyer lady... I like to see the two of them (lorelai and luke) lead to somewhere . “The ice-cream Queen” issue that bugging RORY. The big mirror that become the visible eye between Lukes’ Diner and the new Taylor Soda shop.

LUKE: A giant window! Right here! You can see my entire diner. And when I'm in my diner, I can see your whole stupid store.
TAYLOR: I don't understand why yours is a diner and mine is a stupid store.
LUKE: Look at this place! Look at you. All you need is six dancing penguins and Mary Poppins floating in the corner to bring back two of the worst hours of my childhood.

What else… hmmm... The last highlight will be the scene between LORELAI and her mom. Somehow the two of them should talk! Anyway, they speak but not at the same pace or language i believe.

LORELAI: Mom, why do you always make everything so hard? Don't you understand, this is my last night with my daughter! She goes off to college tomorrow!
EMILY: I know, which is why I was so surprised you didn't want to spend the evening with her.
LORELAI: I do!
EMILY: Then you should've come!
LORELAI: I couldn't!
EMILY: You wouldn't! .

Image taken from: The WB.com
Script taken from: Gilmore Girls Net.

2003-12-03T10:13:00.000+08:00

Am I ?

I was standing on the highest tower in the area.. Beneath me like trillion meters under the platform I can see the land. Preparing myself for a jump and flying all the way to the other side, My mind keep telling myself to be calm. I can do it! Such a baby! Slowly I took my step approaching the jumping point. I looked down. That moment I could feel the weak feeling travelling and conquering my whole body within a moment of second. Why do I have this fear? This is not my first time doing it. I enjoyed my first flying fox experience but this time my confident had flew away before I took the jump. Am I protecting myself from being hurt?

I was eight. Trips to my dentist, which is available at my school at that moment, happened to be my regular event. I went for my check up frequently. I don’t mind if the doctor needs to do some pulling here and there. But today as I grew older, I felt so scared to even drop by and say hello to the dentist. I don’t really have any bad encounter with the dentist but somehow as I grew older securing my self from any pain is my prime concern.

When I was a young kid, everything is about exploring. I remembered enjoying some bet with my friend to sit in the middle of my school road (obviously the road is not that busy at 3PM, just one or two cars using it) despite the danger is there! When I was young I had this feeling of trying! Perhaps imagining the Indiana Jones adventure, I saw my life at that point as being a journey full of adventure! Doing silly thing and have this instinct of trying. Then once we reach certain level of maturity (talking as if I’m that old), having the responsibility and planning out my life, I tend to minimise risk. Protecting myself from doing things that hurts me, Eliminate any event that might backstab myself. At the end my life become very simple.

Well, may be being a toddler and a young version of me, I saw life is all about exploring and trying new things. I tried, I fell, I’m hurt and I cried. But I never give up. I tried again. When I tried to learnt to take my first step, I did tumble down. When I learnt to climb the tree, falling down on the rough sand is common. When I jump from my dad pokok Mangga, I felt as if jumping from KLCC. It’s all about adventure. But today.. I’m different. May be being old securing myself is my prime concern. Life is no longer about adventure but life is about securing them. To secure will sometimes bores us! But that’s what my life might be! Nerghhhh!

2003-12-02T17:36:00.000+08:00

LORD OF THE RING

I've spend my one week holiday watching the movie. Besides myself occupied with the Syawal task, I managed to steal a few minutes here and there to watch LOTR: The Two Tower with 40 minutes extra. This week I'm trying to start the first episode from the trilogy movie. Comments.. hmmm.. I might not be fair enough to comment a movie but what I can say.. I like movie that are carefully produce and I love the technologies use to create a movie.

P/s: MY HUSBAND AND I DECIDED TO BEGIN OUR MOVIE NIGHTS WITH LOTR. TONIGHT AT 830-1200.

2003-11-20T17:33:00.000+08:00

QUICKSAND

... you're playing... you think everything is going fine... but then one thing goes wrong... and then another... and nother... and you try to fight back... but the harder you fight, the deeper you sink... until you can't move...you can't breathe.. because you're in over your head... Like quicksand. ~THE REPLACEMENTS~

Taken from movie the replacements, quicksand is a very nice metaphor. There are moments of life when failure happened to be recurring event. One after another. The more you tried to get the glorious victory of completing the life event, the more you feel losing control for everything. Such situation may occur when you least expected. By the time you realise.. winning is not with you. Strunggling to free yourself from failing soon sink you away from winning. So how do we free ourselves from the quicksand?

2003-11-19T09:57:00.000+08:00

More movie script

I'm still in the movie fever. Yea.. yea I just can't wait for the LOTR:The return of the king. Anyway just to refresh myself with some fact from the previous series, I watched the LOTR: The Two Tower last night. As I watched the movie yesterday, I managed to see some common human character portray by the character created in the LOTR.

[At Entmoot:]
TREEBEARD:
The ents cannot hold back this war. We must weather such things as we have always done.
MERRY:
How can that be your decision?
TREEBEARD:
This is not our war.
MERRY:
But your part of this world! Aren't you? You must help. Please. You must do something.
TREEBEARD:
You are young and brave, master Merry. But your part in this tale is over. Go back to your home. [Desillusioned, Merry puts his coat back on. Pippin tries to comfort him.]
PIPPIN:
Maybe Treebeard's right. We don't belong here, Merry. It's too big for us. What can we do in the end? We've got the Shire. Maybe we should go home.
MERRY:[With sudden insight]
The fires of Isengard will spread. And the woods of Tuckborough and Buckland will burn. And... and all that was once green and good in this world will be gone. There won't be a Shire, Pippin.

TREEBEARD is a common human character own by each of us. Admit or not? most of just couldn't be bother what happened to the people around us untill the incident affected ourselves. Then only we would realise and fight back. A typical human metaphore as describe in this two scene potray by treebeard.

[Treebeard approaches the edge of Fangorn Forest.]
TREEBEARD:
... and a little family of field mice that climb up sometimes and they tickle me awfully. They?re always trying to get somewhere.
[Treebeard walks into an open area, where every tree has been brutally cut down.]
TREEBEARD:
OH! Many of these trees were my friends. Creatures I have known from nut and acorn.
PIPPIN:
I?m sorry, Treebeard.
TREEBEARD:
They had voices of their own. Saruman. A wizard should know better!
[Treebeard lets out a powerful call that reverberates throughout Fangorn.]
TREEBEARD:
[With wrath]: There is no curse in elvish, entish or the tongues of men for this treachery! My business is with Isengard tonight. With rock and stone. [The Ents come marching out of the forest, ready to take Isengard.]
MERRY:
Yes!
TREEBEARD:
Rárum-rum! Come my friends. The ents are going to war. It is likely that we go to our doom. The last march of the ents.
[meanwhile at Osgiliath...]

And I shall end today blog with my favourite quote from LOTR: THR TWO TOWER.

SAM:
I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened.

[At Helm's Deep, Aragorn and Éowyn embrace as Rohan, with the help of the Rohirrim, is victorious.]
SAM:
But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. [The sun shines on Isengard, as Merry, Pippin, and the Ents celebrate victory.]

SAM:
Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something. Even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
FRODO:
What are we holding on to, Sam?
SAM:
[He helps Frodo up and says:]
That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo. And it's worth fighting for.
~THE END~

2003-11-18T15:11:00.000+08:00

Hogwarts headache

What actually this headache is all about perhaps.. here and here had something to say. Well as explain here, Hogwarts headache is an illness. what are the symptom? Lingering headaches, sometimes accompanied by neck pain. Why Hogwart headache? Well simple. Children spending hours and hours of time to read the book. They spend six to eight hours a day reading the book, giving themselves migraines in the process.

Any hogwarts headache patient out there?

2003-11-18T14:27:00.000+08:00

Movie fever!

I’m a movie lover. I find one thing that inspires me all the time is the 5-letter-Word M.O.V.I.E! I love a movie for its trailer! I like a movie for its script. I adore a movie for its technology. I enjoy a movie for its’ song. I just love a movie.

What kind of movie I choose to watch. Hmm I watch almost everything! I say almost meaning not every movie shown in the cinema or TV. Basically the type of movie I choose to watch range from light to heavy movie. Light movie will be stuff like.. “my best friend weadding”, “while you were sleeping”, "practical magic",“stepmom”, “Sweet Home Alabama” and the list just grew.

My favourite script from stepmom will be..

RACHEL
You know every story, every wound, every memory, their whole life's
happiness has been wrapped up in you, every moment...
JACKIE
I have their past. You. Have their future.
JACKIE
Don't you get it? You look down the road to her wedding. You're in the room alone with her, fitting her veil, fluffing her dress. Telling her no woman was ever that beautiful.
Rachel
And my fear is. She'll be thinking. I wish Mom were here.

Next inspiring movie will be warrior and battle movie such as Lord of the ring, Braveheart, Gladiator and any round-table movie like First-Knight, well I find such movie very inspiring. Just watch the latest LOTR trailer and I can feel the strong touch of fight! This include pirates movie. No wonder I used to like Pirates of the Caribbean. I adore the spirit being a fighter. How sometimes these warrior having this strong belive with their belief, they are willing to do almost anything for the country. I just wonder how many of us still have such feeling towards the nation.

Next movie that I find them very amusing is futuristic or sort very high-tech world with fancy gadget and so-called different lifestyle. Even alien movie amuse me most of the time! Movie like minority report, star trek, The girl from tommorow and TV-series like roswell….It’s nice how human imagination manage to capture the non-existed life created in their own fantasy. The fantasy about being different from the rest human exist, the journey beyond the atmosphere, The cute gadget from human life in future and how sometimes despites what era we live or which year exist or perhaps what ever we are homo sapien is still a human.

My next interest will be fairy tales. Cartoon, movie, TV-series what ever the medium is.. Fairy tales is still my prime favourite. Movie like “Beauty and the Beast”, “Cinderella”, “Snow white” and other fairy tales exist. I just love seeing them alive on TV or the big cinema screen. How it’s nice to have dream like beautiful , good girls do exist for one handsome, very skilful prince that one day will save you and even set you free.

My next favourite shows will be.. cartoon. Well I bet this is my longest list ever! From cartoon like smurf, thundercat, he-man to current cartoon like sponge bob square pants and the mummy return, I find this cartoon very entertaining. Not to mention sin chan, doraemon and even KluangMan.

Horror movie? Hmmm nerghhh! Not my taste. I hate myself being scared with such horror movie, sudden movement and that high-pitch screaming! It is so no me! This implies the same for some psycho-killer movie and investigation. Well that's the main reason i find movie like the scream, what you did last summer, urban legend, copy cat, silence of the lamb or any other movie that include murder, investigation and unexplain death... well i can say will never be my no 1 choice.

Finally, Movie... What will my first choice for my saturday movie show? hmmm... harry potter might be my after raya holiday.. saturday VCD Choice. yeaa. why not!

2003-11-14T10:02:00.000+08:00

The day I wrote my first post to this blog, I never knew how it would end. As writing had never been my prime capabilities, I found the comfort of writing helps me! 3 months back, I was completely lost. As job is my prime concern and achieving certain level of satisfactory from my job will always motivates me, suddenly my moral collapse! I lost interest with my only interest! I lost focus! So today as I began looking for the one answer… I definitely believe there is only one answer… “wake up!”

2003-11-12T11:41:00.000+08:00

ADIK-ADIKKU

I read yaz notes about our student being cute and few days back I watched edisi siasat regarding our students and young generation current activity. I believe such news is no longer one new story yet the problem is still there. To blame is a common scenario and solution may takes thousands of time! I really felt sad to see our tomorrow asset being wasted. I believe each of our student have their own potential. To see them lost in their own fast pace life, I pity the future of my country! The challenge being parents and teachers in this nano-speed life is absolutely though. To the young generation, each of you is one great asset own by this nation. To loose one single asset to crime, drugs, moral corruption and more is one major loss. School is never too bad for you. Never waste your life for one so-called splendid jolt of life.

“Adik- adikku, sayang sungguh melihat kalian hanyut di bawa arus nafsu. Adik-adikku sesunguhnya hidupmu baru sahaja berputik. Sayang.. sudah dibinasakan dengan perkara-perkara mungkar yang keseronokannya akan hanya menyeksa dirimu. Kenapa harus ada yang memilih berseronok secara sementara sedangkan kalau kalian bersabar dan mengikut norma kehidupan yang normal, akan tiba masanya kenikmatan satu kehidupan itu tidak terkata. Adik-adikku, sayang melihat kalian membinasakan diri sendiri. Kalaulah wanita tua ini mampu menyelamatkan kalian dan memimpin kamu semua melihat hidup ini bukan hanyan untuk berseronok sahaja. Hidup ini seronoknya bukan kerana sejam keghairahan atau sepenanak kegembiraan. Keseronokan kehidupan hanya akan dimiliki dengan menempuh penat lelah menongkah arus dugaan dan menjalani obligasi kita sebagai manusia kerana setiap dari kita ada tanggungjawab pada …tuhan, negara,nusa,bangsa, keluarga dan diri sendiri. Hayatilah tanggungjawab yang dianugerahkan tuhan di hari tangisan pertamamu berkumandang”

2003-11-05T12:03:00.000+08:00

Just Mumbling
It's been like 4 days he resign! I do knew a friend of mine who felt touch by his disappearance from the news. The things that annoyed me most is .. why can't that man live as a normal man! Let him resign! no more speculation why he resign! i hate to say .. but I have no idea why it is so important for him to leave the position as PM is so important to other opposition party!

I get annoyed reading article here and here and finally here.

Politics is something I'm not keen to play! Why two parties of same nationality with different perception have not respect at all! All this while i respect Nik Aziz for his personality to be a PAS Leader, Dr M for being a PM, and the rest of the existing leader from other parties... But what i hate most people that have no respect with other people perception. Wanting others to have the exact politic understanding as them. Leaving commment showing no single respect condeming others perception and view!

All leader are human! Human make mistakes. Learn from their mistake and try not to repeat that in your life!

I'm getting tired with politic game! I rather be in my silence zone!

2003-11-04T17:04:00.000+08:00

Silence...

Decided to walk into the silence zone! Trying to organise my life as it used to be back few years ago! syyy!!!! *silence*

2003-11-03T09:58:00.000+08:00

Hattrick Anyone?

Hattrick!

Learning to handle a football team even though I have no idea how people play football!Any hattrick player out there?

2003-10-31T10:33:00.000+08:00

SELAMAT BERSARA DR. M

“sememangnya sebagai rakyat Malaysia, tidak kira siapa kelak perdana menteri kita atau siapa perdana menteri kita yang terdahulu, kita wajar merealisasikan tanggungjwab kita terhadap negara. Dan sebagai rakyat Malaysia kita perlu tahu janji kita pada negara berapa banyak yang tergadai betapa banyak yang terhutang… mungkin kita bangsa mudah lupa… mungkin kita bangsa tak kenang jasa, Tapi suatu perkara yang memang milik kita tetap satu bangsa… Selamat bersara Dr M. terima kasih di atas pengorbanan masa sebagai seoarang ayah dan suami demi negara. Dan saya sebagai rakyat Malaysia akan melaksanakan tangungjwab saya”

2003-10-30T19:52:00.000+08:00

The invisible Wall: Part 2

This is a note about the same girl trying to find a way to move on in her life. She happened to have a few complain and she just dragging the issue.
Perhaps some criticism is good for her! We’ll
see!

The clock is still ticking dear!

Eventually, tomorrow will come. Despite what ever happened, tomorrow will be my next new day. If I insist on just sitting here and cry for all the nasty happened in my life, my tomorrow will definitely be no different with today. Is this what I call life is? Sitting and doing nothing. Mumbling and complaining. Ouuuchh!

I drove along the empty road. Listening to the tune I’m happy to listen to. Yea… if life is about complaining other people fortune and grumbling something about my misfortune, then where will my self-improvement be? How do I move?

The tress besides the road never complains! Yeaa… I knew what my heart will say… they are just tree. They don’t complain. They are here as oxygen feeder! Yea right! My mind laughed. Think girl… Think really hard…is your life here in this world is to complain, mumbling and inviting some kind of sympathy from others?

I’m speechless. Hey… I need some answers to my problem here not some psycho trying to act funny. My heart protest! Feeling hurt with the statement produce by my mind, my heart start to keep its distance away from my mind. Realizing the fact that there is like somehow a gap exists between them, my mind shunts my heart away. My mind was just trying to help the helpless heart to see life better. My mind was just hoping that its word would change my heart to see life differently. Instead my heart prefers sympathy rather than some true fact about its incapability. Incapable to handle some true critic from other is something deeply rooted in me! The normal action is to run away! Find another person and start to begin the mumbo-jumbo about the cruel life I had! Typical so typical!

I reached my house. Staring the green gate. Home sweet home… I have to begin accepting other people view. It may not be easy. It will definitely hurt but listening
is good. Sometimes we may think our life is so bad yet if I start to listen I may see that after all my life is definitely a great thing ever happen. I want to believe that! Perhaps my two major lesson today is..Start to ask question on what actually my life is all about and what actually I should do for my life. Next I need sometimes stop all the talking and begin to listen. Listen to other people view. Don’t get to many yes-man companions but having a few opponents are great to build you!

2003-10-30T10:02:00.000+08:00

The invisible Wall

"This is a note about a girl trap between her mind and her heart. She had no idea how to handle her sailing ship. She knew she had to do something but she herself feel clueless! "

I was sitting alone. Staring at the empty monitor. My mind was completely clueless! Why my life has to be this hard? Why of all the human being exists it is me that happened to be the chosen one? Why? My heart scream! Sitting on my chair, my mind was on something else! I give up!

Slowly I touched my mouse and my finger started to run on my keyboard. Out of nowhere, I began to type. It began with an alphabet, then word and later I realised I end up writing few pages of my self-frustration! Blaming the destiny and writing my feeling towards the injustice life I had! Mumbling about the so-wrong thing about the world around me, I felt relief. How long am I going to sit here and mumble? The question happened to play around my mind! I smile! The relief feeling I just felt is only temporary. Tomorrow my self-motivation will be tumbling down the hill. It definitely going to be one of those same old days! I keep having this personal-conflict of personal motivation! Why my life has to be this bad? I bought a book to seek for an answer. I surf the net for some clue. I pray to god everyday for some explanation. Yet the answer is still beyond my reach! I kept saying things like “If mine was bad, there are other whose life far worse than mine. So wake up girl, fight back!” I always comfort myself with positive things! That is what life is all about! Being positive!I may have the best and concrete base of understanding about how my life is going to be; still if I refuse to take any action then this devastated feeling will be there!

Arghhh! Again I scream silently in my heart! I had so many chances and I blew them up! I surrender! I give up! Suddenly there is a moment of silence!

Then I started to feel the world around me began to crush myself slowly. Having very low level of physical energy left to fight back I try to fight the wall! My mind keeps pushing me to fight back. It’s all about survival girl! It’s all in the mind! You need to be a proactive person. You don’t have to wait for the wall to start crushing you then only you going to fight back. But I’m tired. My heart replied to the question raised by my mind. Remember girl in life you should not keep asking why my life is so that bad. You have to stop asking question like what I want in my life instead ask yourself question like what your life want you to do? What can you do for your life? Hmmm…

What my life wants me to do? The question began to overrule my heart, my body and my entire existence of human soul and body! Perhaps that’s my starting point! I have to know what my life want to me do and how I can reach that target! Know my purpose and create the path! I have my purpose and for a beginning I knew how to handle the invisible wall around me, so now am I ready to grab the chance and change? The clock is ticking dear!

2003-10-28T23:45:00.000+08:00

Selat Melaka & me!

I was strolling down the memory lane. Looking back into things I once enjoy most. I felt the warm feeling I used to have being the girl from a small town known as kampung girl. Sometimes when my life was so cramped with pressure and frustration, I would just spare the time with myself… alone and slowly I let my self to travel back into my past.

I grew up as mummy youngest child. Perhaps being the accident child that my mom thought she would never had, I spend my childhood life with my parents; just the three of us. I used to keep thing from my siblings and let secret strongly kept to myself. I see things and I keep them forever. One of the things I treasure most in my life is the SEA. I grew up knowing the existence of sea in me. I felt the spirit of the transparent liquid known as sea. I see them everyday in my life. My father is not a fisherman yet the sea is like part of me! My house may not be the closest one to the sea, yet I can still see the sea from my parents’ bedroom or from my house kitchen window passing by some tree and a house. When the land that we had Mahkota parade now was still part of the beautiful selat melaka , my parents would spend the early Sunday morning walking along the sea. Three of us would spend our Sunday morning walking and going back to the nature. Watching the beautiful morning as it wake up. Capturing the beautiful picture of the free sea in our mind. No wonder sunrise from the look of a man landed on an empty beach had always been the beautiful scenery drawn in my mind. Listening to the sound of originality from the sea minus some vehicles noise. What a sweet memory! Sea had always been part of me! Calling my self as orang pantai, the sea had always been my most loyal companion. Every afternoon when I walked to my kelas mengaji, I could see the sea. Walking along the sea, the sound of wave is like the beautiful tune that no music can replace. Before they closed the small path that leads to my cikgu mengaji house, sea is my every day things that never failed to exist. When I grew up and leaved my home, holiday invites me for some sea reunion event. My dad will drove us in his blue proton saga and parked by the side of the road. Then the three of us (sometimes with the companion of my niece) we will walk towards the Pantai Klebang; the next closest spot for us to enjoy the touch of sea. We will spend the morning looking towards the infinite view of the sea. Enjoying our breakfast and just let ourselves being touch by the invisible hand from the sea; my one constant companionship. I could never explain the touch of sea in me in words. The only thing I can say…
Hidup ini bagaikan laut lepas. Ada masa menganas menghempas pantai. Ada kala tenang dan mendamaikan. Namun walau apa yang berlaku, andai perlu aku menghempas pantai, akan kuredah juga dan jika seandaianya aku perlu menyapa pepasir yang bertaburan di pantai akan ku singgah jua. Jika suatu hari nanti pantaiku sudah comot dengan arus permodenan dan sudah usang dek gelombang kemajuan, aku yakin anak pantai ini akan kembali juga.. kerana pantai ini adalah nyawa dan harapan bagi setiap kekecewan yang dihadapi dan juga laut ini juga adalah simpulan abadi suatu kenangan yang terlalu akrab untuk dihuraikan. Kerana antara aku dan laut terlalu erat hubungannya. Kerana aku anak pantai.

2003-10-24T20:06:00.000+08:00

We are the masters of our life!

Each of us is born to be a leader. Accept it or not each of us is equipped with bit and pieces of element or qualities to be a manager! As a person in charge of our own life, we rule our life with the qualities that we had, we observed the surrounding to upgrade our leadership qualities and last but not least we learn to improve from chapters of real-time implementation. That’s how we became the great leader of our own life. Next we extend the role of leadership to the next layer of closest surrounding which will be our family, our job and other form of element that exist. Furthermore, some people are awarded with an obligation to rule a bunch of human such as being a manager for an organization or even a prime minister for a country. Thus leadership is a core element own by each of us. It’s the number of follower that differentiates the scope of power own by the individuals to lead. Furthermore the size of the follower distinguishes the different tools to manage.

The challenge being a leader either to your own life or to a group of human being in this fast pace life, is definitely a challenging task. With the expanding requirement from not only your followers but also your own need, the task being a ruler is critical. As human life getting sophisticated, the complexity of a simple task is a challenging obligation. To survive in the nano-speed managing path, there are certain things that we need to know in order to satisfy most requirements. I bet satisfying every single requirement exist is impossible yet there is always a way to balance the necessities. To exercise a respectful leadership we need to have the passion. Either it’s about ruling our life or it’s about managing people, it’s still about the passion. So how do we have cultivates the passion?

We need to have reasons and purpose. What actually do we expect as an outcome of this managing exercise? We need to know the meaning of managing. For instance, when we are talking about managing life, what do we expect from our own life? When we work in a company either as a follower or a director, what’s the purpose of us being there in the company? For both cases, will it be money or satisfaction? Ask yourself. Once the reasons are cleared, we have a path to follow. We drove along the highway faster. It builds a strong sense of motivation. It cultivates interesting methods on how to achieve the purpose, how do work around it and it invites a strong motive of loyalty. Next will be credibility and integrity. The two big words simply means how do we do thing the right way. There will be moments during the leadership period when each of us will be tested with series of undeniable pressure, which consume most of our spirits and motivation. At this point of managing period choosing the right path is important. Perhaps knowing the right thing to do is a common understanding own by most of us either from knowledge or even experience, but the courage to do and go against the pressure is the noble skills that seldom own. Despite having the reasons and purpose with personal credibility and integrity, sometimes leadership failed. Why? Patience will be the next highlight. Patience is necessity as a quality that let us see thing from our own perspective. Having patience we do things at our own pace and within our control.

Basically, there are more guideline on how being a leader. Perhaps what written here is just a tiny portion from the big picture! We can have tones of theories but it’s all about how do you do it? The choice is yours!

2003-10-21T18:32:00.000+08:00

FIRST IMPRESSION MATTERS!

Since Friday my life is like a mess. With my jobs cramping my limited hours, I felt like surrendering myself. However, there is one experience I really treasure. First Impression.Being a rigid person, first impression contributes a major perception I develop towards another individual. The first thought that swing through my mind affect my relationship.

First impression does important as it act as a basis to move towards next level in the relationship. As we human cannot not developing initial perception about others. We judge people by the way the act, attitude and behavior! The way they respond! It’s all matter. But to have a very positive impression, we don’t need to lie. Being the original us is important! We don’t have to imitate the masterpiece in us! Even though there’s a Malay saying “tak kenal maka tak cinta” but if first impression pictured the negative side of the other party, how do we move towards the next level of what type relationship we are heading to with this uneasy feeling? What worse when my first impression not only cluttered with negative thought but also invite hates?

2003-10-17T17:57:00.000+08:00

There’s a twister in my head!

For the past 24 hours, my head goes wild. The headache is driving me crazy. As I finished the installation earlier this morning, I felt relieved. Next week will only be monitoring and training. Whatever!

Since my college life, sleeping deficiency is a major syndrome I suffered. I remembered during my final semester, things started to get wild. My final year project thesis that need further enhancement (every time I submit my report, the advisor require more), my lab assignment and my final is just 3 weeks to go. I remembered given to deliver the 12-lab assignment solution and at the same preparing the report and all this happened within a week and on top of that I don’t know linux! Got to grab the basic of linux! As the lab solution can only be tested at the lab, my daytime is fully occupied at labs! Only then, my sleeping deficiency syndrome begins. Having not to sleep for the next 36 hours, I turned out to be a zombie! There’s like this empty space in my brain! I can’t digest any new inputs. I can’t even think! The headache started to create a major burden in my head. Once the 36 hours expired and I went for a sleep! I was so great! Once I finished my studies, I thought no more sleeping deficiency syndrome. I am so wrong! It do happened but at minimal impact!

Today is those days when sleeping is something less important at that point of life. Preparing the hardware life was so terrible! Since we are just using any hardware available for the trial, I felt like a pirate. Hunting down any spare machine available, dealing the managers that not willing to acknowledge the hardware and next I format the machine! Then I realized… arghhh! There’s no installer! Life suck! A job that can be completed within a day consume my time more than I expect to! And that’s how I end until 2AM to just prepare the machine! What worse when nobody knew whose the owner and the hardware just went ‘WENG’. Floppy not working! The display is crazy! The network adapter suck! If only I did not format the PC! That’s a lesson! DON’T FORMAT YOUR PC BEFORE YOU KNEW THE OWNER AND HAVE THE INSTALLER! Simple rule that I forget! So today, once completed, there’s like a bee in my brain! Headache and sleepy! Back Pain! And I started to mumble!

One thing for sure, having this twister in my head, I felt myself being numb! My thought is completely blur! So I decided once finished, I have to sleep! I walked into the office but somehow I left my other half somewhere! Answer call only to realize … ohh it’s you! Derghh! I saw his name appeared! Forcing my eyes to open! Last but not least, I started to see sleep as my ultimate point! Sleep! Sleep! Sleep! Zzzzzzzz……

2003-10-16T09:43:00.000+08:00

My last day with you!

The more I read the written notes of a dad , the more I missed my dad. Sometimes I just wished my dad were still with me!

My last day with him begin at 10 am when my brother and me rushed home from KL. It was December 4, 2001. It happened during the Ramadan month that year. The day was Tuesday! The moment we reached day, he was asleep. My mom said he looks weak and look like food poisoning case. Then he woke up, he smile! But he no longer recognise me! Next I lay besides him. Once in a while when he woke up he talks! I insist of sending him to the hospital, but my dad refused! I remembered the time was 12 noon. He woke up and asked.. “nak hujan ker? Gelap jer”. I replied.. “taklah abah terang benderang tu. Panas terik ni.” He smiled. “I’m getting old”. He doesn’t really talk much. Suffered from stroke, he doesn’t really move a lot!

After the zuhur prayer, my mom said his times are near. I never replied but deep in me I still prayed to god… I hope not. I want him to be with me! I still sat besides him! Later he looks stronger. When my uncle came for a visit around three o’clock, my brother pushed him in his wheel chair! He chats. I felt relieved! Then woman of the families started to prepare meals for the berbuka puasa! When asar came, he went for his prayers. Then I went to see him. We chat for a short while. My handset rang. I remembered my last word..” abah adik keluar jap, ada call.” He answered with a smile. Then my brother took over. We never left him alone that day! While I answered the call, my mom who just finished her prayers came and say..” adik abah dah tak ada..” I could never describe how I felt that day. I was shocked. I quickly rushed to see him. My eldest brother being calm said… “Allah lebih sayangkan abah” the next thing remembered, I quickly cleared the front house. I called my other sister who is still in their way from taiping to melaka! And my other sister! I just left him for a phone call and I missed him forever! He already knew he’s going to leave us. The last weekend when everybody is there, he managed to pass a message to my eldest brother, “abah nak kau nikahkan adik kau.”

Even till the moment his body leaved the house, I was still hoping for him to woke up and return! But destiny had spoken! And a few months later, we opened his james-bond bag. I saw his hand written notes way back before he got stroke.

“sayangilah anak kamu dengan hati dan perasaan bukan dengan marah dan pukulan”

Thank you dad! You make me believe things that once I’m scared to do! You make me believe to accept every challenge even my mind said it’s impossible. And I’ll try my best be a daughter you proud of!

2003-10-14T11:12:00.000+08:00

Astronaut anyone?
Is there any of the blogger here interested to be one? Who knows may be we may get an update from the space from our astronaut blogger soon( * smile * ). Since we will send its first astronaut into space on a Russian mission in 2005, the application is now open. So what do we need to be an astronaut? What do we do as an astronaut? Are we going to be a space researcher or flight engineer? To many question!

Perhaps some infrmation from National aeronautics and space administration (NASA) might helps us on what we need to be an astronaut!

At this moment I was just thinking why would we need to spend tonnes of money just to send a single person on board unless we do have any special research needed! So what do these local astronaut intend to do next year as they travel with the Russian? So what do you think? Care to apply anyone? * Thinking *

2003-10-13T10:42:00.000+08:00

How to choose?

I was sitting on my seat when my boss called me! The first question was why I choose to leave the technical team? Hmm yea… Why?

I love my team so much. I love being a developer. That’s one constant thing that I loved for the past 5 years. Now I’m facing a conflict of interest in me. A confrontation to stay or to leave exists. Despite the frustration I used to have , things are getting better now! At the same time, I feel like going for BD is my next best option to move forward in life. Leaving my existing skill I feel uncertain. What amuses me most is I haven’t even applied for the post. I was just asking the procedure to apply but the rejection is there! I’m firmly sure that I may not be able to move, as the reason will be, “if you are an asset to the technical team you have to stay otherwise we will let you go. We’ll see. But you have to finish your job first before you move!” Am I an asset? I haven’t been doing a lot of coding for the past 3 years. Otherwise it will be easy to switch to another job! I’ve been doing a few coding here and there and most of the time maintenance job.

So now I’m thinking back… why should I leave this technical team? My IT-LOVE
Meters shows that my love is decreasing but it haven’t ceased to exist yet. May be I shall think twice to apply for the BD post. May be…

2003-10-11T10:52:00.000+08:00

Ini aku!

Aku tetap aku
Pandang enteng pada semuanya
Aku masih kekal aku
Pandangn remeh pada sekelilingnya

Kenapa aku jadi begini
Kerana aku wira zamanku
Kuat dan berkuasa
Punya segalanya
Aku ada mata tapi buta
Ada mulut tapi bisu rupanya
Ada hati tapi binatang juga akhirnya
Dan aku akan kelak merobek
Setiap yang ada
Kerana haloba
Kerana nafsu
Kerana gila semata-mata

Aku suka agaknya
Ambil senapang tembak sana
Ambil senajata bunuh semuanya
Buat cerita bunuh yang ada..
Akhirnya .. opss tak sengaja!

Mungkin kerana aku ada kuasa
Maka aku tidak gila
Tapi kalau aku cuma manusia biasa
Dah lama dibunuh agaknya
Sebabnya nyawa manusia dah tak ada ertinya
Lantaklah… yang pasti…
Sadam tumbang
Osama hilang
Minyak aku punya!
Tapi aku belum puas sebenarnya..
Jom cari tanah baru!
Hei! Aku akan polis keamanan
Jangan dilawan… nanti buruk padahnya..
Mahu senang jadi kawan..
Mahu susah jadi lawan..
Aku gelak kamu gelak
Aku suka kamu suka
Jangan dicaci..
Ingat budi yang aku beri..
Jangan buang masa mengutuk aku
Aku.. berkuasa dan terus berkuasa!

2003-10-10T16:32:00.000+08:00

I just love these word!

Quote from a commenter from jikon's blog, the words are trapped in my mind for the past 24 hours!

" You know... a durian tree was planted by my great grandfather in his later years - before my parent even met! I was among the first to taste its succulent fruit." ~sangchinok ~

The words are just .. lovely!

2003-10-10T14:25:00.000+08:00

We are the prisoner of the past!

Being human, mistakes are common. We do mistakes along the way! We learn from mistakes! We don’t achieve victory in a day of winning but from a series of failure! Prone to mistakes sometimes we are trapped in the prison of our own past! Once a criminal forever we will be! Rejected by the society! Isolate from the community, we remain guilty forever!

Before blaming the others, I ask myself, am I ready to set free a once criminal from my own past? How well am I to accept such culprit even though apology had been accepted? How do I accept the offender in my daily life without being suspicious?

The answer is … I don’t know.

Theoretically, I shall set them free from their past! Open the door and welcome their return! Supporting them for better future! Forget the past and strive for better tomorrow. For once a prisoner we are not necessary a lifetime culprit. That’s the best situation! Isn’t it?

The truth is… I’m not sure!

2003-10-09T10:40:00.000+08:00

SELF MOTIVATION TEST
KG your Key Motivator, the thing that really drives you to success in life, is Stability.

"Based on your answers about values, past behaviors, and internal priorities, we can tell you look for ways to be safe, and to understand cause and effect relationships in your life. It's important to you to avoid situations with ambiguous or uncertain outcomes, and you're willing to apply your skills to the right tasks to make sure you've got a backup plan or a safety net for the big decisions in life.

You take comfort in knowing you're prepared for your future and as such, take the necessary steps to make your life more predictable. Whether that means setting up a good savings account, educating yourself, or physically safeguarding your home with alarms or new storm windows, you do well when stability is in your sights. It's not that you can't handle adversity; it's just that you prefer to be prepared for it.

In fact, you probably tend to feel the most secure when you're in control. You've got your life mapped out ahead of you and it gives you pleasure when you see your dreams and hopes met according to plan.

So, don't risk your future. Learn how to tap into your key motivator so you can reach the goals you've always had."

I strongly agree. I am the kampung Girl looking for stability! Feeling secure is my ultimate objective! As such feeling guarantee of safe journey in the jungle of life! what will be you self motivation factor?

Song of the day : Don't speak (No doubt) the song just great!
Dinner Plan : Feel like going to 'big plate' tonight!

2003-10-08T23:07:00.000+08:00

THE DAY!

1 ½ years of marriage, he gained 20kg. Ignoring the fact that he’s reaching the obesity condition, he remained calm. Ignoring all the worries about his new size, he continues his daily life as normal. One day, being warned about the 20kg extra by the doctor, finally he decided to launch a serious food management and active lifestyle.

Planning his meal, menu is a headache. At the same time, sharing the same food with him meaning eating all the healthy food… minimizing all the usual food I eat. Hmmm… I’m speechless. Before we used to order food based on our taste and choice but as the diet day about to begin, we have to think twice! Buying all the fresh fruits, low-fat stuff, juices and more vegetables, this time he looks serious. Declaring tomorrow (9 October 2003) as The Day, today he has to say goodbye to his common meals. Less Nasi lemak dear! Bye bye roti canai!

We began our dinner with blueberry cheesecake, spaghetti and coke (for me) and chicken and coke (for him). We later enjoyed the lovely taste of mocha! And we are about to have chicken pie. Saying that tonight will be the last day before he began his strict food management day, he just enjoy all the lovely food and not to worries about all the fat and cholesterol! Repeating “ last day…”, he ate anything that he wished to eat!

Supporting his serious food campaign, I wish him all the best to beat the 20kg. Can he do it? Nobody knows! Good luck dear! Hope to see you loosing some weight soon! *smile *

2003-10-08T18:04:00.000+08:00

The friendship

Knowing them makes my serting life great! Knowing them is fun. However being me I lost them somewhere along the timeframe! Thank you for the friendship! Only thought and memories remain! Thank you!

2003-10-07T09:35:00.000+08:00

The feedback !

I was having a mini discussion with my officemate regarding sex education idea during breakfast and lunch. Partially I was influence by the article . Trying to seek some feedback from them, I summarise the article I read to inject some inputs. Along the way I clarified my stand.

“ I don’t know how the other countries teach their kids as far as sex education is concern, but I believe we have our own style of teaching our kids here! If in other countries they educate their children with subject like maths, history and so forth… are we teaching the same subject based on the same syllabus and method of teaching? Definitely no! We have our own guideline and content! Thus such comment is not applicable!”

As I further elaborate based on the article (I wasn’t going for deeper study on that except I was keen to knew the feedback), I got a bizarre feedback from 3 of my officemate! If any of you read this, I’m sorry! I mean no offence!

The first feedback was…“ So you are one of the government people…”

Woo! What was that? It’s not about me of being pro-government or not. I was trying to have a conversation on a little bit serious topic! I was interested to know how the common Malaysia would feel towards the issue! I was trying to see our stand for the issue! *growl *

The second feedback … “ Isn’t what we have with existing education system is enough. We learnt them in biology!”

Basically, sex education is not about the picture most of you have right now! Sorry dear, even though I score A in the quiz and test for the topic in biology, I personally think that it is insufficient! If I were to be rape (thank god I wasn’t) at that period of time I never knew! Because in biology we were taught based on the science point of view. But sex education ( my personal view ) is from the human point of view! On top of that sex education if to be taught in school is not a 5 years of learning just on the doing it but it’s a subject teach to educate this kid what actually happened to them. Focussing more on the rapid development in them! I would really appreciate if my kid to knew what period is all about! Why do they suffer period pain! How to handle them! Why do we have PMS and stuff like that! Compared to me, I was clueless when I first got my period! I knew nothing! Absolutely nothing! Thus I would really appreciate if my children to be taught about their development formally as they would not be as clueless as I am!

At the end of the day, I was sort of frustrated with the conversation I had. I guess I shall be back to the normal topic like… “My child yesterday… blah blah blah…” or “ you know one of our officemate…gossip begins”. Perhaps my topic is not appropriate for mealtime conversation!

2003-10-05T23:07:00.000+08:00

The annual Kenduri

I grew up having this annual kenduri as one of my annual activity. So last weekend I went back to my hometown for the kenduri. Held every year at my mom house, the whole family will gather. But how long will this tradition last? No body knows.

Physically, the kenduri is just kenduri. Food served. The Doa. The cooking activity and more. Years past. The atmosphere change! I used to meet the whole family during the day. Family from Singapore, KL and Melaka will gather and together we will cook and serve for the day. Jokes is the greatest element. We laugh and we chat. The moments are great! Tiring but nice. Despite some tiny-winy clash here and there which is expected to happen but the experience was great!

But today, times change the whole concept. I bet most of my older cousins will definitely forget my existence being me. Calling me with my sister name is common! We no longer cook together. We pay others to cook. My cousin arrives when the event are just a few hours to start. Not everybody is there. Only some! Everybody seems to be busy! We used to provide 20-30 tray of food. Today only 15 trays of food were served include family! The atmosphere differs. The rhythm change! Perhaps the kenduri will soon last for just 1 tray serve! No body knows.

When this tradition initiated by my grandfather, the whole idea of having it is to bring each of the family member together. But today, my cousin is another alien in my life. The united feeling is no longer there! Times past. Commitments diversify! Family focus moved from the whole family to a more close relationship. I’m not blaming anyone. Perhaps as we grew mature we tend to focus different things. * smile *. Life!

2003-10-03T12:21:00.000+08:00

Saya bukan pengiat seni! Jauh sekali aktivis seni! Saya Cuma seorang pemerhati dari luar akan perkembangan seni tanahair. Dimana letaknya mutu seni tempatan kita?

Terlalau banyak yang goyah dalam sistem seni tanahair. Dimana silapnya dimana salahnya? Saya mungkin salah seorang penyanjung hasil barat tapi saya adalah saya seorang rakyat tempatan yang mahu satu rombakan dan penghasilan mutu seni yang lebih baik.

Muak dengan cerita erra fazira dari sembilu hingga ke cinta kolestrol, saya jadi kacau bilau! Kenapa terlalu banyak cerita cinta yang tiada intipatinya? Kalau pearl habour boleh ada cerita cinta di zaman perang sebagaimana kita ada embun, kenapa kita tidak boleh ada lebih banyak embun! Tapi jangalah dah ada embun kita ada cerita embun2 pula! Plot yang sama cerita yang lain! Kalau dah ada cerita jepun, tak usalah ada cerita komunis pula! Dimana kreativiti kita?

Seperkara yang ingin diperkatakan ialah kelemahan skrip dan idea untuk penghasilan cerita. Bagi saya kekuatan filem ialah dari kekuatan skrip dan idea cerita tersebut! Sebagaimana yang diperkatakan oleh SM dalam blognya di sini dan NZ di sini berhubung cerita cinta kolestrol.. Belajar oversea 8 tahun, Litar F1 pun tak tahu ada kat Malaysia. Kalau tak tahu ada restoran mewah kat kampung kita bolehlah diterimakan.. tapi tak kan tak tahu ada F1 kat Malaysia kot! Tak kan belajar kat Oversea tak ada internet kot. Kalau idak tak adalah Idlan leh hantar blog dia setiap hari? Ye idak?

Saya juga rungsing dengan pengunjung wayang sendiri. Dari dulu sampai sekarang saya masih tak faham kenapa ada orang menangis pasal filem sembilu! Bukan menangis tahap sikit tu! Bagi saya ianya cuma cerita cinta biasa tak ler macam cinta CT .. bukan cinta biasa. Saya masih menanti pengiat seni Malaysia melahirkan satu filem yang benar ada kekuatan dari segi skrip, idea dan juga penghasilannya! Tak sabar menanti sentuhan suhaimi baba! Agaknya kalau nak tunggu negara kita ada cerita alien .. 1000 tahun tak akan mungkin!

Seperkara yang mengelirukan saya ialah dimana maruah filem tanhair kita berbanding dengan negara jiran kita? Dimana kedudukan kita dalam penghasilan karya yang bernilai? Dan kalau boleh lawak filem janganlah melampau. Penonton tempatan tak semuanya suka! Dan juga sejauh mana penonton kita masih ingin menonton wayang-wayng sebegini?

2003-10-02T23:59:00.000+08:00

My own style of seeing a scene!

People are everywhere. Some are just hanging out. Some are trying to shop. The rest are just strolling down the path. Enjoying the beautiful decorated shops. The mannequin wears the best clothes sold in the shop. What a rich view!

In a corner, two young girls wearing lovely baju kurung and pinafore. Both are reading books from the famous author. Both concentrating and absorbing the knowledge pass through the printed words. Ignoring the noisy people and loud music, they both lost in their own world! In between, smile exchange. Mouth sealed. The reading continues! What a silence beauty!

In the food court, a couple was enjoying their food. The steaming nasi and tauhu bakar pull them away from the world around. Bits by bits the both enjoy the meal as part of one delicious moment! Insist to succumb to the temptation, the couple shunt the nature of human as the maid still entertaining the naughty boys known to be the couple kids! What a scene!

Walking away from the noisy shopping complex, the LRT never failed to speed the journey. An old lady entered at dang wangi station. All seat are occupied. Leaving no option, the old makcik had to join the standing crowd. A young boy stand up and walks towards the makcik. Seat taken. Mak cik smiled. What a man he will be!

Driving from Kelana jaya station, the car is racing towards puchong. The tollbooths are just a few second distance. But the queue is long! Suddenly without any notice the white car from the left queue tried to intercept. Instead of having a line for a tollbooth, we now have two! What a selfish scene!

Tired and exhausted I park my car in the porch. Smiling to the neighbors’ child and grandmother, I walked into my house. No word … No conversation. Only a smile! What a neighbor I am!

2003-10-02T14:09:00.000+08:00

Which Season Are You?

You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...

You're warm, and the most approachable. You have that gentle prescence about you. People can relate to you, and find you easy company.However it's likely you've been hurt in the past and it has left you scarred so things can become rather chilly with you at times. Being the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy and loyal to your friends but prone to depression and negative thinking.

Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)

?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-10-02T00:14:00.000+08:00

Being me!

I was enjoying my dinner when flashes of you pass. Suddenly I freeze. For a moment I found myself cast with yesterday mantra. My oh my… the world is small. I never knew this one-day will happened so soon. And as I remain static, I can feel you still being you looking at me from the look you once had! The look full of question! As you slowly approach, I can hear the sound of me tremble. I can sense the feeling for being guilty!

Slowly you took the opposite seat. When the two eyes meet, I started to act weird. I feel the uncomfortable feeling sitting on the seat I pay to sit! For a moment I went blank! Images from the past slowly emerge. Words once said started to sing in my ears. Feeling once felt started to be felt. And me being me remain silence. No word exchange still I can hear you.

“ I never knew why you choose to leave. But I must say this once and for all. I never knew the reason and I will never try to investigate. Yet one thing I need to know, if leaving means open the door for another man I must say it’s understandable. But what puzzled me most you leave for nobody why?”

I smile and remain silence for a moment.

“ I choose to leave not for another man. I choose to leave for myself. I lost myself the moment I knew you. I alienate most part of myself to be with you. I change myself to be with you. But one day I realize I’m no longer the girl I used to know. If to be with you means to be a stranger for myself then I rather loose you than me. I want a man that accepts me for being me! Not somebody that meet me and change me!”

“I never change anybody to be with me!” You demand for an agreement. But I decline.
I smile. No more argument.

“Is that you interpretation of being you?” You ask arrogantly. I pick up my handbag and slowly I stand up. Before I started to walk away, I look into the person I once care.

“I’m sorry if being me hurts you! If I once accept you being you so today accept me for being me! Case close.” Sorry. I believe between us is over. I’m not bound to explain anything anymore. I walked away feeling happy to be me! Total freedom!

Relationship is all about sharing the strength and weakness we each posses. If to have a partner means to surrender part of me and morph into a new hypocrite… What can I say!

2003-09-30T22:55:00.000+08:00

Why? (An interpretation from my own eyes.)

I was sitting alone tonight thinking back about things you said. I was here alone with no one to share .I’m clueless. With the feeling we share I no longer feel the heat. Why oh why…?

Driving along the highway of time, together we face every obstacle. We fulfill each other incapability. We cry together. We make each other laugh. We are about being you and me! To some such love scene is another Hollywood movie; to us it is about the passion we share; the passion that drives me to struggle in the hectic life being a woman, wife, and daughter. We claim the relationship as being us. We sail together in a ship of trust and care. When the waves are too rough for us, we never retreat. When the winds are too wild for us we never let each other down. A wonderful fairy tales!

Being another half of me, sometimes I misunderstood you. Being the feminine part of you, you overlook me. We jeopardize the moments we share since anger controls us! We buried the sweetness essence of our partnership for one-shot argument. But we never cross the border until now….

Knowing the existence of another woman in your life, not as our daughter but another partnership… I confused. I fear the consequence when you breach the contract of polygamy. Justice!

As I sat alone tonight looking at the dark night sky, I felt the emptiness. As the star spread on the black sky, pieces of me shattered. If we were once deeply in love, why in just a moment of time the love monument collapsed? What worse after all that we’ve been through you leave me without turning back? You choose to sail on a new ship leaving me alone in this deserted port. You leave me stealing the half part of me. Handicapped and alone I can feel me being me… alone and alone. What worries me most despite for every pain you gave I still allocate this tiny space in my heart for you to return with our ship to pick me up and together we will sail; This time I will make sure the journey is all about sailing…

To the one: I salute you for being one patience wife who hopes for him to return.

2003-09-30T12:52:00.000+08:00

The things I used to like as I kid

M&m is the best chocolate ever

Sunday breakfast at warung is the best moment

Mak besar house in Kg Baru is the best place in KL

Mak ngah House at Dover Road (I guess) is the best holiday destination in Singapore.

Playing getah,galah panjang or roundess ( i guess it spell that way) is my every evening top priority

The thing I used to like as a teenager

M&m is still the best chocolate ever

Family Dinner when my siblings had their bonus or first pay cheques is the best dinner ever!.

Hang out with friend at Mahkota Parade or Fajar ( before we have mahkota) is the best momment.

Watching movie is the best activity ever

Playing doom, wacky-wacky duck shoot and the chip game ( what was it nudge?) is my daily highlight

The thing I like to do today

Cheese cake is my no 1 choice (chocolate… hmm I quit)

The payday dinner is something grand!

Hang out with friend or husband anywhere is my No1 choice

To relax at home on Sunday is the best activity ever

Playing games like the Sims, lion heart, war craft etc is in my daily highlight

Sometimes something never change but sometimes things change!

2003-09-29T17:43:00.000+08:00

Where have all the manners go?

The time: 9:00 AM
Venue: Opposite partition

The phone next partition rang. Feel lazy to pick up. I just sat on my seat.
The phone keeps ringing. Arghhh!!! Pick it up anyway.

Caller: “hello, may I speak to Mr so and so?”
Me: (look around) “ sorry he’s not in.”
Caller: “ Do you have his mobile no?”
Me: “ I’m sorry I don’t have it.”
Caller: “ Do you work there or what?” Caller hanged up

What was that? Where are your manners? Drained by your super-duper-tongue-of-yours!

2003-09-29T16:23:00.000+08:00

"Your love nature is thoughtful, poetic, mystical and mysterious. A few people with love attitude number seven are class clowns, and they usually attract guys/gals who like to be given a hard time. But most of you are the quiet, reserved types who dislike calling attention to yourself. Your type generally attracts guys who feel the same way you do. Your defined, independent and secretive nature is very alluring to certain guys/gays. At times, you can also be somewhat fault-finding and a little demanding in your love relationship and with friends. You're mostly attracted to guys/gals who aren't like all the rest; a loner easily attracts you. And, if he/she reads a lot and enjoy learning, he/she is especially perfect for you. " Got it from yaz blog.

How far the truth is? A mystery to solve the... hehehehe!

2003-09-29T09:56:00.000+08:00

Something to write on monday!

I’m happy for my brother who waits for more than 13 years and finally he’s going to be a dad. Congratulation man! Really fell happy for you! Next year will be one nice year. I’m expecting 2 niece/nephew since we are not having one pregnant sister-in-law but TWO! Most of all, I’m sure the 13 years of waiting changed my brother. Yup he’s somebody completely different. Suddenly I see him as one man who is so concern with his wife while he used to be the normal don’t-care husband! * smile *

2003-09-29T01:00:00.000+08:00

TV and movie; the infinite list!

I grew up watching too much TV and movie I guess. Being obsessed with movie and TV series, I could spend hours and hours of my daily 24 hours to watch TV. So talking about TV series, hmmm.. I watch almost everything except documentary and news! I guess I’ve spoilt myself with entertainment shows. The Box we called TV is something I treasure. I used to spend my daily 730 with my dad watching our favorite game show such as jeopardy, wheel of fortune, supermarket sweep (I guess) and more.

Let’s talk about TV series. From local to something foreign, I enjoy the companionship. My no 1 choice will definitely anything with alien, technology and stuff like that. That does explain why I like star trek since I’m 13 years old till now. Next will be X-file followed by another show about a future policeman catching future criminal who travel back past the time ( I just forgot the title of the show). School holiday favorite will be Allana, the Girl from tomorrow followed by Ewoks. Comic series I like will definitely be Superman, SuperGirl, Superboy and now smallville. That flying man character has spoiled me. (The song save me by remy zero just can’t get out from my mind). * Smile *

Another type of show I like will be cartoon. My list just endless. I still watch cartoon till now. From Smurf, He-man, Thundercat, Highlander, and now my favorite cartoon is anything shown every Saturday and Sunday. I think the highlander cartoon is cute. Being a cartoon fanatic and animated series fan, I salute final fantasy despite I hate the ben affleck voice.

Last but not least will be movie. Hmm where shall I begin? Perhaps a TV movie I definitely remembered will be “teenage witch”. Then my list again grew. Talking about movie, I finally manage to watch the fifth element on TV with an ending. Thanks Nila for the SMS. Anyway I took nearly 5 years to know the ending. I never knew the ending till last Saturday. Why I never tried to buy the CD, nobody knows. Hehehehehe…

Being obsessed with movie and TV series, I guess I’ve designed my life having TV as my center point. That’s how my life evolves. So let’s begin my tiring 5-days with something nice like… Hoping to watch a better fight in the next survivor series, charmed and definitely my flying man series! Smallville had tones of spoilt teenager due to the meteor. And I never knew why but I just adore the spirit Lex have; to be a man not like his father!

Smallville script taken from Twiz TV
Lex: From the time I was born, I was raised in an environment of suspicion and distrust. My father taught me to regard everyone as an adversary no matter who they are.

Helen: (She stops) I’m really sorry you had to grow up like that, Lex, I am. (She turns away again)

Lex: When my mother died, I began to build a wall around my heart. Every year that wall grew taller and more fortified until eventually it became impenetrable. I want to tear the wall down, Helen, I do. I just-- I don’t have the slightest clue how to do it.

Helen: (Turning around as she takes a deep breath) Lex...

Lex: I never once asked anyone for help, but I’m asking you now. Help me, Helen. I don’t want to become my father.

2003-09-26T18:50:00.000+08:00

My job are piling. My time are decreasing. My blog not expanding. Finally, My niece are planning for linkin park concert. Should i or should i not ? I wish i could settle thing out by next friday!

2003-09-24T10:32:00.000+08:00

Catatan sendirian

Bila terhimpit
Antara dua denai kehidupan
Melatah mencari sinar kebahagian
Lantas yang nampak Cuma bayangan harapan
Mendesak diri terus mencari
Kenapa memilih jalan ini?

Denai jalan sunyi
Tiada manusia menemani
Tiada insan membimbing
Sesekali bersua jua dengan
Sebayang dua manusia
Yang mencemuh kegagalan
Yang mengeji kejahilan
Malah ada juga
Memuji sekelumit pencapaian
Menjulang setitik kejayaan
Hingga khayal dengan secubit kesenangan

Mudahnya aku hanyut
Senang jua aku lemas
Dan bagaikan si dungu
Aku Membiarkannya…
Ku tampar diriku
Aku masih degil hanyut
Kenapa aku selemah ini
Senang dibuai noda
Mudah dihanyut godaan

Akhirnya aku terus alpa dengan denai yang semakin menyesatkan diri

2003-09-23T22:59:00.000+08:00

Are we human enough?

What makes you a human but not just another occupant in this world? Have we ever wondered that? Being an occupant we just worried too much to manage our life! Being just another habitant in this planet known as earth, we just ignore the element of humanity exists. Since we are just another package that survive, we tend to manage our personal environment by ignoring the fact that every occupant atmosphere is a subset environment to others. Thus most of the time shared with another oxygen-consumer is focused towards personal satisfactory and gained.

Back to the main question, what makes a person a human? Thinking hard on that matter I became unaware that the list being a human is back to one simple concept; Life Implementation. Life implementation comprise of 3 major components; physical, logical (mind) and spiritual. To be a human we have to be fit physically, logically and spiritually. Each of the requirements complements each other. Thus ignoring one component may lead you to imperfect life implementation. Thus in order to have an ideal method of implementation, we gain them through years of study in the school of life!

Looking back into the current existing situation here, how many of us are aware that most of the human exists nowadays had transformed themselves into a habitant who inherits a combination of the trait listed:
Extremely physically built

Logically oriented mind

Lacking of spiritually element.

Being an extremist of the listed combination, most of us tend to corrupt the beautiful humanity exist.

Having the physically strong power, most of the human die by the name of ‘injustice’. Believing to be strongest human, we tend to rape the peaceful earth. Blood flooded the fresh land. Tears dropped to wash the pain. Sympathy never gained! At the end, human body is another asset for international news.

Possessing the strong logical mind, we tend to be one reasoning person. Every event required explanation. Explanation will be acknowledged by a profound logical analysis. Evaluating life for a trophy of success leads to personal gain. That is one measurement tool exist. Accepting the logical point of view that lies by the social status that comes with the personal gain, relationship became very materialistic oriented. Knowledge mastered to advance the process. Betrayal exist! Trust broken. Friendship sold for a sack of gold! Trust gained by the pay cheque.

Spiritual that is corrupted by rejecting the life of balance human leads to one sick person. Spiritual is the key to manage your life. Every religion and belief provides the guide for the path of a concrete basis. Unfortunately many failed. Ignoring the strong urge for religion and belief to exist in the heart of life, Moral corrupt. Human became a beast of temptation. Having no sincerity, we became a society full of fraud. Having no love for the society, manners are stabbed by the hand of excitement.

At the end we are left we a question, will humanity be the next element ceased to exist?

2003-09-22T17:19:00.000+08:00

why would you ask ASL before you chat?

Yahoo messenger had been part f my life for the last 3 years. But one thing that annoyed me when I started a chat with an anonymous person is the ASL word. Why would asl exists as a prerequisite for a conversation to begin? Can't we just chat!

Why is it so important being a Malaysian, Girl and 25 is so important to all the chatter out there? Can't we just chat on something if you don't know how old I am, where I came from and whether what type of human I am. You don't even know me at first place, so can't we just share some thought as two anonymous person! Unless being anonymous is so not important we may need to reveal something about me first before we can chat. Being an anonymous on the street we get used to the question "asal mana?", thus I can accept the alphabet-L from the asl acronynm. But I definitely can't figure it out the relevant of knowing my gender and age have anything to do with the conversation. Get something else. Otherwise don't contact anybody by the anonymous basis! Or perhaps why don't you introduce yourself first before we chat!

What would you have to say about ASL?

2003-09-22T14:32:00.000+08:00

Some thought on local stories!

I am the novel reading type. I don’t have any specific interest in the novel I choose, I just read. Even though the novel sucks, I’m the kind of person who will continue to read till the last page. One of my favourite local novel is by abd talib hassan …… pelarian. A nice novel that I find it different!

Talking about local novel, I have to admit I don’t read a lot. I started to picking up the habit again around 3 months ago after 5 years retirement ( after 5 years retirement I found the trend never change). For the past 3 months I read like 10 novels from my personal collection. Not included those that I borrowed! Out of the 10 novels I read, none give me the satisfaction I used to have when I read “Pelarian”. I’m sorry to the entire local writers but this is just my personal thought. May be just me alone! The rest of our local people still enjoy the million novel exist in current market! But I found the existing collection just suck! May be I choose the wrong book I guess. In general, most of the novel I read have common feature: typical love story with nothing else to tell. How a man who hates a girl will finally married that girl? How a contract marriage will soon end as one happy marriage! I believe we have a lot of local vibration that can inspire us to write! And this goes well to the local movie industry! Except for one or two movies the rest is just another plain love stories! Not to mention the telemovie! How long will our movie-people or storyteller community are going to offer the same old genre! Get some local essence that might be simple but nicely tackle. The viewers are getting mature. I’m not saying love is not essential as romance influence but we have to see the stories ( movie or novel) as a masterpiece. To have a nice painting we need a touch of love and a sprinkle of beauty to support the essence! Not just a canvas of love! or a splash of beautiful colours. We had that too much in the industry and I really thought somehow we need a revolution for our local stories industries! Another thing, can somebody highlight to me why somebody who can’t act well being the queen of actress here in local movie industries? Is it essential for every novel to have a beautiful woman to be the strong element in the novel! Come on be real! I have enough of this beautiful- handsome prejudice storytelling culture!

2003-09-22T11:00:00.000+08:00

Just imagine!

Life without TV?

How do we blog without computer?

Life without phone? Unthinkable!

No car... No traffic jam perhaps?

I can't live without my handphone for a 24-hours! Just imagine... if we were to sent back to the flinstone era!

2003-09-22T10:30:00.000+08:00

" We give fast service no matter how long it takes"
~Naan Corner, Ampang~

What you have to say about it? How you interpret them?

2003-09-20T01:56:00.000+08:00

Bicara rindu seorang anak!

Kesunyian malam begitu sepi sekali. Suasana yang kaku ini mengigit diri. Di waktu-waktu begini aku bagaikan merindui hadirnya disisi. Sesekali di hari-hari aktifku, melihat anak-anak kecil dimanjai ayah aku jadi cemburu. Kadangkala melihat ayah tua dan cucunya aku mengeluh. Ruginya anak-anakku kelak. Tidak mengenal ayahku sebagai atuk. Malah melihat nenek tua dan atuk tua, aku sedih mengenangkan ibuku. Tabah menghadapai masa sepi ini sendirian. Mungkin mak ada kami berenam tapi manakan sama suami yang seorang. Kalau aku sesekali cukup merinduimu abah, apatah lagi mak yang meniti waktu senja tanpamu disisi. Mungkin aku masih belum merelai pemergianmu. Sebagai muslim aku menerima takdir ini! Malah sesekali bila rindu ini bagai ombak yang mengganas aku jadi buntu. Yang aku ada hanya rakaman memori dalam kota ingatanku. Aku mungkin masih cuba belajar walaupun 2 tahun sudah berlalu. Dan semakin aku belajar menerima ketiadaanmu aku semakin takut kehilanganmu dari memoriku. Lantas aku bagaikan berperang antara rindu dan takdir kehidupan.

2003-09-19T18:06:00.000+08:00

Why do talented employees leave companies, often despite good salaries?

Early this year, Arun, an old friend who is a senior software designer, got an offer from a prestigious international firm to work in its India operations developing a specialised software. He was thrilled by the offer. He had heard a lot about the CEO of this company, a charismatic man often quoted in the business press for his visionary attitude. The salary was great. The company had all the right systems in place - employee-friendly human resources (HR) policies, a spanking new office, the very best technology, even a canteen that served superb food. Twice Arun was sent abroad for training. "My learning curve is the sharpest it's ever been," he said soon after he joined. "It's a real high working with such cutting edge technology."

Last week, less than eight months after he joined, Arun walked out of the job. He has no other offer in hand but he said he couldn't take it anymore. Nor, apparently, could several other people in his department who have also quit recently. The CEO is distressed about the high employee turnover. He's distressed about the money he's spent in training them. He's distressed because he can't figure out what happened.

Why did this talented employee leave despite a top salary? Arun quit for the same reason that drives many good people away. The answer lies in one of the largest studies undertaken by the Gallup Organisation. The study surveyed over a million employees and 80,000 managers and was published in a book called First Break All The Rules. It came up with this surprising finding: If you're losing good people, look to their immediate supervisor. More than any other single reason, he is the reason people stay and thrive in an organisation. And he's the reason why they quit, taking their knowledge, experience and contacts with them. Often, straight to the competition. "People leave managers not companies," write the authors Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman.

"So much money has been thrown at the challenge of keeping good people - in the form of better pay, better perks and better training - when, in the end, turnover is mostly a manager issue." If you have a turnover problem, look first to your managers. Are they driving people away? Beyond a point, an employee's primary need has less to do with money, and more to do with how he's treated and how valued he feels. Much of this depends directly on the immediate manager. And yet, bad bosses seem to happen to good people everywhere. A Fortune magazine survey some years ago found
that nearly 75 per cent of employees have suffered at the hands of difficult superiors. You can leave one job to find - you
guessed it, another wolf in a pin-stripe suit in the next one.

Of all the workplace stressors, a bad boss is possibly the worst, directly impacting the emotional health and productivity of employees. Here are some all-too common tales from the battlefield: Dev, an engineer, still shudders as he recalls the
almost daily firings his boss subjected him to, usually in front of his subordinates. His boss emasculated him with personal, insulting remarks. In the face of such rage, Dev completely lost the courage to speak up. But when he reached home depressed, he poured himself a few drinks, and magically, became as abusive as the boss himself. Only, it would come out on his wife and children. Not only was his work life in the doldrums, his marriage began cracking up too. Another employee Rajat recalls the Chinese torture his boss put him through after a minor disagreement. He cut him off completely. He bypassed him in any decision that needed to be taken. "He stopped sending me any papers or files," says Rajat. "It was humiliating sitting at an empty table. I knew nothing and no one told me anything." Unable to bear this corporate Siberia, he finally quit.

HR experts say that of all the abuses, employees find public humiliation the most intolerable. The first time, an employee may not leave, but a thought has been planted. The second time, that thought gets strengthened. The third time, he starts looking for another job.

When people cannot retort openly in anger, they do so by passive aggression. By digging their heels in and slowing down. By doing only what they are told to do and no more. By omitting to give the boss crucial information. Dev says: "If you work for a jerk, you basically want to get him into trouble. You don't have your heart and soul in the job." Different managers can stress out employees in different ways - by being too controlling, too suspicious, too pushy, too critical, too nit-picky. But they forget that workers are not fixed assets, they are free agents.

When this goes on too long, an employee will quit - often over a seemingly trivial issue. It isn't the 100th blow that knocks a good man down. It's the 99 that went before. And while it's true that people leave jobs for all kinds of reasons - for better opportunities or for circumstantial reasons, many who leave would have stayed - had it not been for one man constantly telling them, as Arun's boss did: "You are dispensable. I can find dozens like you." While it seems like there are plenty of other fish especially in today's waters, consider for a moment the cost of losing a talented employee. There's the cost of finding a replacement. The cost of training the replacement. The cost of not having someone to do the job in the meantime. The loss of clients and contacts the person had with the industry. The loss of morale in co-workers. The loss of trade secrets this person may now share with others. Plus, of course, the loss of the company's reputation. Every person who leaves a corporation then becomes its ambassador, for better or for worse. We all know of large IT companies that people would love to join and large television companies few want to go near. In both cases, former
employees have left to tell their tales.

"Any company trying to compete must figure out a way to engage the mind of every employee," Jack Welch of GE once said. Much of a company's value lies "between the ears of its employees". If it's bleeding talent, it's bleeding value. Unfortunately, manysenior executives busy travelling the world, signing new deals and developing a vision for the company, have little idea of what may be going on at home. That deep within an organisation that otherwise does all the right things, one man could be driving its best people away.

Agree anyone?

p/s: I received this text as a forwarded email. Sorry i can't quote the resourece!

2003-09-19T14:28:00.000+08:00

TRAFFIC JAM
Traffic jam is something common in KL. Meaning to say, if you flipped through your daily organizer there you have it…

530-630: on the road, traffic jam!

How many of us spend an hour of your daily 24-hour just to travel to office? Besides than those travel using PutraLRT, Star, Komuter and motorcycle traffic jam is well… I can say … a routine!

The thing that disturbs me most is how people react to traffic jam? How sometimes traffic jam can be reduce if each of us have a little patient in us! With existing car flooding the road, it would be best if each us could just maintain our position in the queue till the end. Unfortunately, as human are cute, there are some joker here try to intercept the long queue of cars using the emergency lane (I can still accept this). But how about a scenario when he/she uses the leftmost lane (for left-turning purpose) to cut the queue. Instead of having the current 2-lane traffic jam now we had 3 lanes, nice huh? This also happened at traffic light junction and tollbooth! Cutting queue is something we’re good at or perhaps being opputunist i guess!

Another interesting moment will be accident time. Using lesser lane than normal, the bottleneck situation something we cannot escape from! Thus, either you have alternative road to escape or follow the traffic. The thing that amuses me is having such a caring society here; we would slow down to see but not to help! Worse still if the accident is on the opposite direction, the traffic jam will also occur in both directions!

But what ever I say, traffic is a common scenario. We often have this picture in our mind, wouldn’t it be nice if I have a doraemon pocket to flip my car and put it inside! Then I would walk until I reach certain checkpoint to unpack my folded car and continue the journey! If only I had a doraemon!

2003-09-18T17:01:00.000+08:00

Bubur nasi anyone?

Having the picture that everybody is at office and me resting at home settling a few things and enjoying the ample time I have for myself, what a beautiful picture I had today. So today as I was finishing my coding (yup have to bring back my office job as I am way back behind the schedule), I have this temptation for a bowl of hot porridge ( aka bubur nasi or some people call it kanji). My family no 1 choice. Ok ok.. not everybody but most of us!

Talking about “bubur nasi” served with telur asin, sambal tumis ikan bilis ( ikan bilis should be crunchy), small piece of chicken ( marinate with soya sauce, oyster sauce, sugar and salt and fried), kangkung and definitely my mom Air asam ( not the one we eat with ikan bakar)… ahhhh! Nyum nyum! Not to forget bawang goreng and daun bawang and daun sup… lovely! Not to forget a sprinkle of pepper and soya sauce ! hmm... lovely!

When I’m still a kid, that’s our favorite Sunday breakfast! My mom's choice. Now the tradition will be passed down to the younger generation. Ask my niece … Right Ina? My friend used to say that bubur nasi is for the sick people. Well not for us! Bubur Nasi is the best meal ever. Simple but lovely.

2003-09-17T09:51:00.000+08:00

Donation!

Mari kita menderma buat adik Ash Amier Andyka Bin Nor Hisam Usni Taib. For further detail, please visit adik Ash Amier Andyka Bin Nor Hisam Usni Taib web page!

2003-09-17T09:10:00.000+08:00

What my name have to say about me?

As I was browsing the web, i found an interesting link that describe me from my name.

"Although your name gives you a good appreciation of material values, business ability, and skill in organizing and managing others, your success is restricted by a lack of self-confidence and initiative. This name brings out a practical, materialistic quality, with a strong desire for a good standard of living in an environment where you are in contact with refined, successful people. You try to further your interests through pursuing the association of people with influence. Being well-groomed and well-dressed at all times is important to you as you always strive to make a good impression on others. Your interests are more focused on your social life and convivial living, with any pressing or difficult issues being put off as long as possible. Any weakness in the health would affect the fluid functions, and you could suffer through kidney trouble or female problems. "

Hmm.. Just wondering how far the truth is? muahahahahaha! Got to improve my self-confidence and initiative then!

2003-09-17T09:06:00.000+08:00

what your name have to say about you

Your name of Azhari gives you a highly sensitive, idealistic, and intuitive nature. You could be expressive and creative in the arts, music, or drama. Since you are not inclined to give due consideration to practical and business matters, you could miss out on reaching a level of financial success appropriate for your efforts and abilities. You feel and sense much that you do not fully understand, and you can be deeply influenced through the thoughts of others without realizing just how you are being affected. Others are inclined to take advantage of your generosity and friendliness and then, when there is a lack of reciprocation, you can feel despondent and disillusioned. Moods are a problem as you can be highly inspired one minute, and the next become quite irritated and annoyed over some ill-timed remark or lack of consideration on the part of someone close to you.

The name of Najwa has created a congenial nature with the desire to associate in friendship and understanding both socially and in the business world. Peaceful and settled conditions appeal to you and you are naturally desirous of having the security of a home, where your life could follow a definite pattern, and where you would not have to make major decisions. You find it difficult to take a definite stand, partly because you lack confidence, and also because you dislike any issues which create dissension between people. Procrastination is a weakness of your nature, causing an inability always to complete your plans or to concentrate for long. You need to see a concept presented completely in detail before you can understand it, and if you cannot understand it, you come to your own conclusion and often fail to listen to and reason out another's point of view. You resist being forced into change and could become almost impervious to new ideas. You desire refinement, understanding, and appreciation, yet sometimes your outward attitude does not reveal your innermost feelings, and thus you have never felt truly understood.

The name Suliana gives you a strongly independent and highly creative nature, with drive and ambition to have experiences and accomplish things out of the ordinary. You can work intently at whatever is new and holds your interest at the moment, but your interest wanes quickly when drudgery and monotony set in. Obstacles to your progress or restrictions on your freedom to act create a sense of frustration which may cause you to feel resentful and even rebellious. You can then become intolerant of others, and caustic and belittling in your expression, thereby imposing stress on your personal relationships. Although you have a clever, quick, capable mind, your progress in life is restricted by instability in your affairs and misunderstandings with people. Your impulsive nature can lead to actions which you later regret taking, or to accidents. Relaxation is elusive, and depletion due to nervous tension can develop to the point where you become subject to moods of depression and morbid thoughts.

The name of Suraini indicates you are a diligent and persevering worker who enjoys a routine occupation where you can do a job well and finish what you start. You like to work at your own speed, without pressure, as you prefer to take your time to work step by step in your own way. You could become frustrated and thwarted in your efforts if too many changes or disruptions occur. Also, you do not appreciate people enforcing new methods or ideas on you, as you like to examine all the details before making changes. It is difficult for you to be spontaneous and affectionate with those close to you, as suitable words and actions do not come to mind quickly. In association your tendency to state your mind simply and clearly, without diplomacy or finesse, can lead to awkwardness or embarrassment.

The rest sorry! your names are not in the database!

2003-09-16T14:18:00.000+08:00

Why I'm easily hurt?

I was talking with a friend of mine during lunch when he claimed me for being sensitive perhaps too sensitive. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not angry with your statement! Anyway I was thankful to you for saying them in a sense I can say… decent words. I admit I am being emotional for everything in my life today. Like he said I shall tried to ignore some words from other people around you sometimes if not always. I think I shall and I do.

By nature woman and sensitivity (aka emotional) is something nicely package. Most of the occupant from the insensitive world claimed that. I agree as far as I am the guinea pig in the sensitive test. I can easily hurt! I do and I am! I personally could not defy such statement.

Basically there few factor why woman (actually just me) being easily hurt and emotionally affected.

Communication
Living in this competent world, communication is important. As each of us by right are different, communication is a powerful tool to convey your message! Expressing my thought and idea sometimes easily misinterpret. Perhaps one thing I can say will be ‘me being just me’! I normally say thing based on my brain speed, situation and performance while the people around me had a brain of their own. Thus their brain processing capability may not be at the exact pace. Thus, other started to judge me wrongly! Or I tend to convey my message wrongly! Why? Because I don’t understand the current environment. Thus, I had to say thing in a way that most people can understand at the equal level of understand. When I tried to ignore such fact and expecting other to see thing from my own perception, that’s when I hurt!

Logical
I can’t expect each of the people to view thing as one unified logical point of view. Things that sound logic to me may not be acceptable to others. Such situations exist. Thus I have to tolerate without having interference from my anger side. I had allocate certain level of acceptability as human is a complex subject by itself!

Organised
Allocating various subject or element of life into certain division in my daily organization would definitely draw one organised human being. Why? Because when we tend to mix them up, we found that sometimes we tend to hurt ourselves more. Well, I need to be professional as far as job is concern. Be more easy-going as far as relationship is concern and on top of that be more open for different subject of life. I can’t expect relationship to be carried out professionally but more humanly. I would definitely can’t bear the fact that job should be carried out with emotional preference. There are rules for every game played. So I have to play by the rule. Don’t try to mix them up!

Finally, I shall try to teach myself to be more open up! Free my self from the cocoon. Don’t try to judge everything based on my personal perception. Learn to accept word from others. Bind them well with your personal life understanding to create one fine day not only for you but for every occupant in this entire world. Another wise thing to say, learn to forget things and move on! Construct a better you for better tomorrow!

2003-09-16T09:28:00.000+08:00

A bowl of soup and fish ball

If any of you are interested for a bowl of soup full with all kind fish ball, sotong ball or any associates stuff, don’t forget about me! Well, my first encounter with such hot lovely food or perhaps they called it Yong Tau Fu was when I was still a child (around 7-8 years). My parents brought me to this small stall at Bandar Hilir. Since then I could not stop myself from returning to the stall. Now the stall had been moved to the row of shop near to melaka raya. (I think so! If I got it correct… Yup the pondan area based on EDISI SIASAT! )

Unfortunately I find it hard to have such hot and lovely dishes any more here in KL. Most of the time the yong tau fu served here is the one with the black sauce! So as another alternative for me, I would normally go for steamboat instead.

I remembered when the first time I brought my colleague for a tour in melaka. That moment was great. In each of their mind young tau fu is served with the black sauce. Thus, selection would definitely be wild! Once served, I could see the look in their face. I definitely remember how each of us tried to finish the bowl of soup, mee hoon and fish ball. At the end, everybody just sit back and surrender! To irni, najwa, nila, sue and the rest, how about another trip for young tau fu?

So today talking about food, I will definitely love fish ball and soup! Suggestion anyone?

P/s: Nudge, your yahoo banner yesterday drives me crazy for chocolate! Arghhhh!!! Chocolate.

for survivor maniac out there try this link
Quotation of the month

The first and most important point to remember is that eating should be a pleasure--do not eat purely for health, you won't live much longer, but it will feel like an eternity.

* Mark Porter

2003-09-15T12:55:00.000+08:00

MRSM SERTING REUNION!
Since I miss the reunion... I was just wondering is there any serting out there willing to share the night a bit with me!

2003-09-15T11:23:00.000+08:00

THE BACHELOR : REALITY TV SHOW

One guy to choose one girl. Which one among the girls will be the one he will propose?. That's the big picture of the game!

I accidentally watch the show last night on channel 9 as I was playing around with the remote. I don’t care what you guys had to say about this-so-called-narrow-minded-brain-I-had but hey … the game suck! I can’t tolerate the fact that all the girls living in the same house waiting to be kick out every week and seeing him dated another girl? How would you feel when you see the guy is dating other housemates of yours? I hate to admit but I just hate the show for I believe why should the guy decide who among the girl he should kick out this week. I believe they have the opposite version ( I don't care much on that!) All I can say is... it suck man! I hate the show so much! I do and I am! Even though I like realty TV shows, but not this one! How can you have a game that manipulates a series of social gatherings and exotic, romantic date! It's a show of desperate guy and a bunch of girls. Even though the candidates are capable to drop out as she found out that she’s not the compatible one!

2003-09-15T10:11:00.000+08:00

Lesson 1: How to handle a crying kid!

Last weekend is the best experience for my husband and me. Well during the weekend we spend to be a father and mother to my niece age 6 and 4. The night when I should attend my reunion, both of us were having dinner at Awan Besar with the two kids and my mom. The moment when we reached there, the 4-years old boy started to act funny.

My first challenge was when we reached there. He started to act ‘everything-serba-tak-kena’. Sitting and standing then started to cry ( kid dangerous tool). Both of us were clueless! After a few second of persuasion and a little bit of threat, the kid finally said his desire. A box of chrysanthemum tea. Ok first challenge settled.

Next when I was ordering the food, again he started it out! He needed to go to the toilet. Actually what the boy intended to do was to survey the area for any future prospect request. Yes! he found the shop that sell titbits and toy!

While we were enjoying the sate and nasi, he requested to go to the shop. This time he requested them badly. So both of us again persuade him to sit, enjoy the dinner then later we could do some shopping there. But he remained demanding! I was really not sure what to do. Luckily when we said “makan dulu. Nenek lapar. Lepas ni kita gi.” He accepted. The moment my mom finished her dinner, he started to pull her.

The climax of the night was when he reached the shop. Walking in and out, not knowing the choice, he started to act funny. The sister is not such a fussy. She just grab the sweets and that’s it. But the boy he started to act ‘want-something-but-don’t-know–what-to-buy’ attitude. It’s like a few minutes of in and out. And that’s it. I grabbed his hand and started to pull him away. (sound cruel,huh?). Guess what? He started to cry. The volume .. MAXIMUM! The funny thing is the statement the kid made.“Aduh.. sakit… mak usu. Tangan adik luka berdarah.” So worrying that I may be too harsh on him, I loosen up the grab. He managed to run. “mak usu garang!” he added.

Boy! he gave me a headache! Still acting the same latter, we said to ourselves enough! My husband just grabbed him and carried him away towards the parking lot! So of course he would cried at the top of his voice and again he made another cute statement. “Pak cik.. sakit. Pak cik cubit sampai berdarah.” Definitely, my husband panic. Not to mention how we felt with the look from other people. When we already leaved the Awan besar, around 10-15 minutes latter, I asked.
Me: "boy, mak usu garang ke tadi?”
Boy: "aha.. tapi…. ( a momment of silence) mak besar lagi garang!”

All of us were laughing. Suddenly my elder sister is the culprit to be blame out of nowhere. Kids… they are funny but a major headache! I still like the statement when I grabbed him. On top of that, the sister were really being protective as she blamed my nail are hurting her brother! Kids...

2003-09-12T17:16:00.000+08:00

Friday Mood

I want to spend the weekend :-

Chit-chat with my mak!

Find solution to my 2 orchid plant.(the only plant I had actually. I don't understand why the leaves that should be green is now yellow!)

Cooking lots and lots of food!

Purify myself for being so mad yesterday!

I want to play squash this weekend. bring along my niece and mak. hehehehe!

Should I or should I not plan next week trip to Genting!

Sitting at my own seat with a comfortable feeling and listening to the budget which I don't really care much! I should take this budget seriously.

2003-09-11T18:54:00.000+08:00

When love betray...
Love is a splash of feeling that consume most part of our life even if it’s existence last for just a tiny moment of your life. However most of us are not aware or perhaps tends to ignore the fact that love can hurt us once and last for eternal period of time!

For my dear one,
I can see the pain in you yet I have no word to say. Listening to every single word of how love had mistreated you made me one speechless person. Really I had no word to say. I was stunned with how matured you had grown! How you handle things out. Things happened dear! Whatever reason that hurt you; I want you to see the world as one big picture. Life goes on! Be tough!

My heart ached as I sat there and had no word to comfort you. I am. I just listen. You may have been hurt once but you still insist to allocate a place for the person in your pure heart. I can’t stop you from loving him if that’s the choice you decide but my dear listens don’t let anybody hurts you twice! The most important thing will be he had to choose! Don’t let him choose you for sympathy! Let him choose you for the person he sees in you! Never let anybody downgrade you if you are not the chosen one. Perhaps you might be the luck one!

My dear,
I know how each of us has some dark side or incapability of life! How sometimes we are one weird person. But my dear such thing can be change! WE had live with such so-called unacceptable or weird behavior for a period of more than 20 years. Thus nobody in this world can leaved us only for one incapability. WE need time to change! WE can’t transform within a day of time but things changes slowly. So we can change to be a better person as the years of life matured. So being impatience is not the reason as we learn to improve slowly.

Finally,
Remember we love you for every single day of your life. You had mom and dad that will be there for you! You got me. You got the whole bunch of family that loves you. Thus don’t keep thing by yourself. Stand strong and be one grown lady. We may sometimes overlook the fact you are no longer the young girl but one fine lady. Thus enjoy this life being a lady and soon a woman. We love you.

2003-09-10T16:37:00.000+08:00

Artikel >> Kuala Lumpur bandar raya paling ramai wanita cantik

An article about 'Kuala Lumpur bandar raya paling ramai wanita cantik'

KUALA LUMPUR 7 Sept. - Kuala Lumpur dilimpahi dengan lebih ramai wanita cantik mengikut satu meter persegi berbanding dengan mana-mana bandar raya di planet bumi ini, menurut seorang ekspatriat Australia yang tinggal di sini.

Lance Skelton berkata sejak tiba di sini beberapa bulan lepas selepas berkhidmat di empat benua sebelum ini, Kuala Lumpur memberi kejutan indah kerana dapat bertemu ramai wanita cantik.

"Tetapi hakikatnya terdapat ramai wanita di sini yang begitu cantik. Apa yang mengejutkan ialah kebanyakan wanita ini nampaknya tidak mempunyai idea mengenai kecantikan mereka yang menawan.

"Mungkin kerana anda boleh melihat Ratu Cantik Dunia di mana-mana seperti di gedung membeli-belah, pasar raya, kedai kain, gerai makanan, kafe, syarikat kecil, syarikat multinasional, bas dan tren," katanya dalam sebuah artikel dalam isu terbaru The Expat, sebuah majalah bulanan yang diterbitkan khusus untuk masyarakat ekspatriat di negara ini.

Skelton berkata tarikan di Kuala Lumpur cukup baik sekali kerana lokasi dari segi geografi dan kestabilan politik di Malaysia menawarkan wadah tumpuan kepada kebudayaan orang Melayu, Cina India, Indonesia, Thailand, Myanmar, Vietnam, Filipina dan Singapura bergerak, bercampur, berkahwin dan berkembang.

"Jadi, anda kesudahannya bertemu dengan kumpulan wanita eksotik dan anda akan melihat kesemua pengaruh genetik pada warna kulit, raut wajah, warna rambut, bentuk badan dan loghat. Ia sungguh memukau," katanya.

Menurut Skelton, kecantikan dan misteri wanita Asia adalah salah satu topik perbincangan umum di kalangan lelaki ekspatriat di Malaysia.

"Namun, ia jarang dibincang secara terbuka. Ia seperti satu rahsia yang kita tidak berani berkongsi dengan rakan kita kerana takut ia akan membentuk sesuatu yang kompleks tentang makhluk manis ini yang berjalan dengan langkah longlai, memakai baju bersaiz lapan atau mengenakan seluar jeans ketat dengan warna kulit yang baik sekali serta senyuman menggoda," katanya.

Beliau juga memerhatikan bahawa wanita Asia adalah berbeza kerana berorientasikan keluarga, pegangan agama yang kuat, berdikari, menawan serta bijak dan berusaha keras untuk menjaga hati rakan mereka. - Bernama

What would you guys had to say about this?

2003-09-10T16:06:00.000+08:00

A Letter to all my friend
My dear friends

Every time I heard the clock tick I remembered the laughter we used to share. How lovely the jokes we used to share! Even the tiny moment like eating maggi or buying drinks can makes my page of memories nicely written. Not to mention watching movies together and during your birthdays! The egg smashing party, The birthday everybody just too tired because of the shopping and at the end everybody just fall asleep and more. Singing our song from our bed or having our own version of ‘show me the meaning of being lonely’ song. Not to mention the day when we had to complete our demo after being attack by virus, we had to get everything ready within 48 hours. At the end we had 4x100-sleeping match. Hmm… Really my dear friend even though I may not be able to direct the best movie about us still the picture of us is the best moment we share. Apart from that, I remembered my MRSM friends. Remembered the day we were caught by our warden for the night party! Some were hiding under the bed. Not to mention when the moment when we had to move the bed with a bunch of naughty girl hiding under. What a memory! I remembered when 3-of-us dress in baju melayu for the dorm-party; troublemaker, spoiler and joker! I still remembered our names! Life is really great! To friends like Lisa Marie Tan, Peggy, Jasmine, Chelvie Lee , Hui Fhen and more.. I really love the time we share together. Remembered the pigeon chest teacher. Funny huh? Thanks for introducing me to the world of fear street collection, Archie comics and more. Not to mention the word of guidance from Lisa when I found history is one-major-headache subject.

Friends,
There are moments when I became a poison dagger that cut through the attachment we had still I’ll find the cure to heal the cut! There are few pictures when I just spank the platform we share with the angry twister, sorry my dear friends. Knowing all of you with different characters and behaviours just makes my painting of life more colourful.

So my dear friend,
Even though I may just be the silence character in your life now, flipping through the page of memories I still treasured and cherished every single jokes! I can recall names like undertaker! What happened to that mysterious guy! I wonder. I still appreciate the time we used to share. If only one day I could gather every single friend I have and used to have, I believe the whole day is definitely full of tracking down the lost friendship I used to have.

Finally,
To my existing circle of friend, thank you for being there when I need! Remembered if you have anything that bothers you, I’m here to be with you! For friendship is something that kept me being human! Besides my parents and my family! Thank you to all my friends that once rest even for a second in my personal timesheet of life! Peace !

Yours truly,
KAMPUNG GIRL!

P/s: I began my day with our favourite song: ‘SHOW ME THE MEANING OF BEING LONELY’. Thank you 92.9.

2003-09-09T10:22:00.000+08:00

BISIKAN SEMANGATKU

Bisikan masa menyaksikan aku
Menguliti alam percikan ilusi
Bertatih di atas jejari garis kehidupan
Setapak maju seribu langkah tersungkur
Lututku luka tersungkur
Sikuku turut tergaris luka
Sesekali air mata mengalir jua
Kerana aku sakit
Lantas aku enggan bertatih
Aku cuma merangkak
Sedikit demi sedikit
Apabila aku melihat kebelakang
Tiada jejak yang kutinggal
Apabila memandang ke depan
Tiada arah tuju
Ironisnya hidup ini…

Aku tahu duniaku bukan monolog kehidupan
Tapi tidak juga sesak dicatur
“bangunlah anakku..sampai bila mahu merangkak..”
“Aku takut mama”
“Usah takut anakku. Sekali rebah tak akan selamanya terbenam”

.....Aku tersedar.......

Sehulur tangan membimbingku kembali…
Setapak aku menghayun langkah
Mama tersenyum
Aku gembira
Dua langkah dibuka
Papa sedia menanti
Aku makin berani
Tiga langkah…. Dunia berubah
Mama.. Papa?
Hanya kabus ….

Mainan ilusiku terlalu hebat
Dan aku masih melangkah.
Aku mahu segera sampai…
Aku mahu tiba di hujung titian..
Aku mahu segala-galanya berakhir

“jangan anakku.. duniamu masih jauh terlukis..
Mama dan Papa sudah tiba dihujungnya
Kamu masih muda
Titianmu masih teguh
Dugaanmu masih hebat
Jangan kau cantas hidupmu hanya kerana
Satu kedukaan.
Tiada manusia yang tidak gagal
Hanya kita menentukan sekuat mana kita bangun…
Teruslah meniti anakku..
Berlari bila perlu…
merangkak jika itu yang kau mahu..
tapi jangan lupa…
doa kami sentiasa mengiringimu..
kerana hanya kamu milik kami..”

“Mama!”
“Papa!”
suaramu hilang… kabus bersahaja…

“Anakku, Papa mungkin tiada disisi…
Ingatlah setiap kata-kata Papa
Papa tak mahu hatimu disakiti
Papa tak mahu dirimu dilukai
Tapi anakku
Sekali hatimu disakiti
Papa melihat ketabahanmu
Seribu kali dirimu dilukai
Papa menyaksikan kdewasaanmu
Papa cuma mahu anak Papa
Teguh berdiri,
Tabah menghadapi,
Kuat meniti
Seperti perwira bangsa epikmu sendiri
Papa bangga ada anak sepertimu”

Aku berehat meniti
Mencari-cari wajah mereka yang sentiasa setia disisi
Sekali lagi aku dibuai ilusi
Lantas aku tersenyum… manisnya mainan ini.
Aku bersantai menghayun kaki….
Adik rindu Papa!
Adik Sayang Mama!
Terima kasih
kerana sering setia mendampingiku
dalam .... Setiap ilusi
...............Setiap memori

~Kampung Girl~
9/9/2003

2003-09-08T13:59:00.000+08:00

My silence thought
Politics, a very subjective issue, is a sensitive and somehow very delicate topic to be discussed. Due to the impact, all this year I kept my thought to myself. Sometimes being criticised for my silence, I remain firm with my belief.

I grew up in a small town family which politics is something absolutely firm and unified in belief. I guess politics is something in the blood. From my grandfather, my dad and now my brother, politics is something not what we read and vote for, to them politics is about part of them. I used to hear my mom mumbling about my dad travel here and it’s just for the politics. My dad may not be the minister or the main people for the party but he was the person that took politics seriously. And for that, we were strongly believed in one. But that belief faded.

During the politic revolution back few years ago, I’m still a student. At that moment politics is something I heard during dinner, from my father-son conversation and even brother-to-brother talks. Considering myself too young to be part in such world, I listen. I see. My interest tarnish!

Not to mention with all the corruption and personal interest politics, I found politics is no longer something nice to see and hear. I heard plenty words about the opposition incapability and corruption. But I don’t see the path carve for better advancement. I see so many missing spot in current politics era; still I don’t see any action taken. I had enough of this blaming each other scenario, all I want was some plan, some future for my kid and how basically this plan is going to work. There are theories saying that such plan could not be revealed due to ‘copyright purpose’, well I don’t know about that! For me, my respect is for the person who I believe capable to create better environment and future. I’m not interested for the party or the party manifesto what so ever. I don’t force myself to believe in something since my age requires me to vote!
And for me politics is not just a one-main topic. It’s a fight for diversify issue. From economy, social improvement and more, I want to hear any evaluation measure had been taken for the existing problem. Got the solution then how to implement them. Don’t just say them. We need to have a plan to work it out also! Definitely a whole unit that willing to work to make this country a safer place to live-in! That’s what my political point of view! Until then, I guess my views remain unknown!

2003-09-08T09:37:00.000+08:00

When I know the departure point!

Knowing that I had already book a departure ticket to the eternal journey after life makes me wonder how well am I in handling such situation? Each of us knows that the farewell point may come. It’s just the matter of time and how. Being informed having certain amount of time to still be part of this universe, the accepted fact death is something sure to happened drives uncertainty. How good am I when every second is a precious moment, counting every seconds as the duration expired and worse of all seeing all the things around you that soon you will leave them behind.

I was touch when one of my cousins who passed away around 9 years ago whispered her last word of hopes was to survive just for her only child. How she fought cancer for the duration more than 5 years but at the end the destiny had spoken. She really filled her last 2 years of life since knowing death is certainly to happen as predicted by the doctors with the passion to still be part of this world. Never to give up!

If I'm in such situation I just wonder how well am I to swallow every single fact of life that each single element of life that I own and feel at this specific moment will be left behind soon. How people still giving you hope but theoretically the hopes are killing part of me! Touching every surface of life that soon will be a history! Listening to the word that one-day will be a total silent. If such destiny is mine I’m not sure how well could I handle the last moment I had. Perhaps the only thing I want will be to be with all the person I love and prepared myself for the journey. To my cousin, we may not be that closed but your spirit from this distance perception I had inspired me of how strong we can be during the delicate point of life.

2003-09-05T12:44:00.000+08:00

Friday Recap

Having so much tense for the past one month, I’ve reached certain level of frustration, emotional breakdown and also some wild anger! (Sound cruel). Anyway, yesterday when I tried to evaluate the situation and the person I turned into, I managed to spot a missing spot in me. I lost the person I used to be before the tense attack started. I miss that missing me! So today as I was finishing some leftover jobs from previous attack and not to mention receiving interview offer for a business development executive (the job is completely different from what I did now), I suddenly start to feel the missing person is back.

Having the new spirit that slowly blooms in me, I can feel the passion for this field is still burning. I knew I love this IT field so much that I can’t think myself being somebody not doing a programming. Somebody who felt her finger is so used typing the programming jargon instead of proper English. Somehow the major attack in my life made my love for this field stronger! I’m so in love with the tense that blend together with IT job atmosphere!

So today looking the situation from another perspective or angle, I believe that the harsh words from my customer made me see the big picture better. Nobody can downgrade me! I may not be the best programmer in the company still I’m proud to be what I am now. As I mention from my previous notes,
“Because I always believe in things like : To move forward you may fail may be once, twice or perhaps more, but one day you never know; you may take that one big step appreciating your life better.”
and still believing with those words, the one-month doom is just another lesson I need to discover from the school of life. It makes me see that such catastrophe makes you the sole survivor and believe with myself past-performance, I still want to fulfil my one-dream from the day I choose IT as my destiny; for that I ‘m thinking about the interview; should I or should I not! God, making decision is something I’m not good at!

2003-09-04T15:17:00.000+08:00

Thing I decide to do about job and myself
>> Change my mobile no. No more answering office call on personal line. For helpdesk I shall now channel the call to the proper support team.
>> I want to eat something hot and local. For instance Ikan bakar and nasi or nasi putih, sambal tempoyak or sambal belacan. No fast food.
>> Start smiling and no more bad day mood!
>> Still looking for a new job!
>> I want to have nice deep, sleep today. No more phone call nightmare. No more emotional breakdown!
>> Watch Pirates of the Caribbean again perhaps!
>> I want to call my Mum to check her preparation for Labuan this weekend.
>> Call my niece, Ina.
>> Finally finishing the writing!

P/s: Shaf thank you so much for yesterday! I had reached the ‘I_HAD_ENOUGH’ zone.

2003-09-04T13:12:00.000+08:00

SORRY LABU D’LEGOLAS

I wrote this blog for you Labu. Sorry because I was kind of piss off with you. You were kind enough to assist me instead i just gone mad with you. Like I say I need to channel the anger properly. Instead I just let my anger control me and forgetting the fact it’s not you that should be blame. The problem was just a minor very much minor but the customer were scolding with the kind word of which is too harsh for me and perhaps I was so tense with the work lately that I decide to just let it out.So Mr Legolas (I’m definitely sure you are smiling) I’m sorry. Would accept my apology?

2003-09-03T20:35:00.000+08:00

When I'm just the woman to blame..
For the past 3 years my job require me to travel all over KL. Sometimes even outside KL. Starting as developer now a support team member (the only support team until 3 months ago), I am now tired doing the same thing. So today I want to spend the whole evening pouring my feeling and let the whole world see what my job had turned me into.

I started out as a fresh graduate who have no computer-telephony integration (CTI) skill on Dialogic platform. I learnt how to do my coding by learning from other people source code, help system and the sample. No training or what so ever. Of course I admit my first application wasn’t great. It’s terrible. However, knowing my mistake I learn and improve my application until it is quite stable now. Along the way, when there are other project that requires my contribution, the whole gang and I will developed a short-notice application for demo purpose. I remembered there’s a moment when I need to develop just web page portion while the other two person need to build the CTI and a daemon for the demo application. In turn out that the other two components are not talking in a synchronous manner. Instead of spending the Sunday doing my web, I spend the Sunday troubleshooting the two-person application. It turn out the protocol differ. I changed the code. Only then I can see the data coming in the web page.

During the Labour Day year 2001, I went to office to finalize my work for the 2nd may installation. Since the project is a duo-team project, I was kind of frustration when my teammate spend the holiday at home but I was stuck in the office to finalize the installation. Reason: he was attending training the whole week! So this girl here needs to settle thing alone.

Next when installed at new sites, one of the so-called experts did not even know how to set up parallel telephone wiring for two applications. Blaming my application as the source gave me major headache. Feeling dissatisfactory, I look into the phone system that the so-called expert did. Once the problem identified I started to do parallel system by my self and the so-called expert (a guy for your information) just watch me doing his job.

Having 9 sites to monitor, I am now the person who will take care all the sites ( for the past 2 years). Even though the total of the whole 9 sites installation reaching 500K, the recognition is not mined because the telephony card often fail. The faulty card is the major problem, which hunted my daily life. My company just labeled my job as not challenging enough. Starting then, from a developer I am now an unofficially a support team member. Working 7 days a week to entertain customer call, taking the 730 plane and be back at 9 PM and be at my table at 845AM the next day, Listening to customer call, entertaining the weird human behavior and more, my job is exhausted. Not to mention my back pain due to being extremely tired. On top of that it is me who sat under the table to rectify any hardware problem and organized an immediate solution. I had millions of anger to write but it will definitely bore all of you.
one most valueable answer to remember is when i was ask to accept new job and answer sincerely.
me: “ When I got new job, my current job will always interrupt me. ”
PM: “You got nothing to offer to the top management. So you got nothing to bargain.”

Next I reached the climax when one of the sites is down, I called the business development Executive (BDE) to prepare the quotation and called the respective customer. At that moment, I had already arranged for the official technical personnel to prepare themselves and my supplier for price quotation and hardware delivery (since I am attending 8-days training), the entire task had been completed. The only thing I need was the agreement from the customer to pay for the maintenance cost and also the BDE to prepare the quotation. Guess what the BDE say… “aku malas ler kau call boleh..” I just told her I had a training to attend and hang up.

Later the BDE cause another problem when I told her about another sites problem and requires repeating the same process. The BDE called and reached the voice message then leave message. From time to time I ask about the status as I could not proceed but the BDE claim that customer haven’t agree. Finally, When one day I was scolded for being slow and inefficient from the customer, I scolded her. One day later the problem settled. Not to mention for other similar cases, I had to spend my time until late 10 O’clock since she commit to the customer to deliver the item within two-days. Having no hardware, I need to travel from KL to Cyberjaya back to KL again to prepare all the required hardware. And not even a sorry I get but just a SMS saying.. “Sites dah ok?”.

My customer had gone mad again because today once again the sites are down. Since the management agree with ‘no contract no maintenance’ policy, I tried to settle the contract and maintenance issue first before settling the hardware problem. Late in the evening, My customer called blaming me again for being inefficient, slow, mentioning previous cases which I’m not the one that caused the delayed and finally he mentioned the magical word
“I understand being a woman it is difficult for you to go for outstation, then why don’t you send the guys to do the job.”
“I don’t understand since a woman take over the job your support team had became inefficient or SEORANG PEREMPUAN LEMBAB. I tak faham kenapa you perempuan buat kerja lembab.”

So here I am.. is it wrong to be woman who are just doing the support job? Is it wrong for me being woman who can’t deliver my job on time because some other people didn’t do their job and the person to blame is me? Is it wrong to blame me for the entire thing I had done since the person that allocate me as support team is a guy also. So now I am waiting for new job and to resign and leaved this nightmare behind. And I am waiting for the day!

2003-09-03T10:38:00.000+08:00

MY JOB SUCK!

My Job suck...
So do I
My .exe are bad
as bad as am I
what else can i say
than sit back and relax
waiting for a warning letter
or a jobstreet offer

till the day i place my resignation letter
i'm still stuck here
answering call as helpdesk assitant
not to consider the maki hamun
and not to care about motivational factor
what else can i say
A loser I am
hoping to be a better man
hoping today or may be next day
perhaps all i need is a change
rather than 6% increment
or may be i'll rather don't care
till the one day!
my independence day from the company!

2003-09-03T10:28:00.000+08:00

Some frustration to share!

As usual, after dinner reading blog had been one of my daily routines. As I was reading one of the blog I was kind of disbelief to find out that one of local magazines did what all of us consider to be as Plagiarism. Taking somebody else idea without giving the credits to the writer, what else can be say.

I am neither a writer nor a reporter still logically in what ever we do if something is not mine the credits should be given to the owner. However, in this case based on the Chatlog posted in the blog, it seems that even the reporter colleague refused to admit the incident as Plagiarism. Well may be our locals people are still not into taking legal action situation yet which makes the reporter (should I consider the writer as reporter as first place) just taking his position as ignorance is a bliss.

Reading local magazine, it seem like there are tonnes of missing pieces in the article written. It’s been ages I had never bought or even read such magazine for I belief if I’m looking just some common gossip, such magazines is the best choice. Other than that ignore it!

It seems to me in our local magazines today, there are lots of good magazine to be read. It offers different angle of knowledge and information for our mind to digest. However there are few local magazines, which offer nothing but some common love story, gossip and picture here and there, picking up other people ideas and there you have it.

Another point to share will be there exist not many but perhaps one or two writers who refused to admit their mistake. As we all know these so-called writer are human. Thus human is not a perfect living creature. We make mistake. So do I. The only thing that differentiates us is how far can we accept and admit our mistake. So back 1-2 months ago during Akademi Fantasia fever still a wild growing phenomenon, one of the local writers had reported inaccurate information in their article. Well this thing happened. We all knew that. What makes me sick was such writer instead of just saying sorry and case close, wrote another article the following week saying that other reporter do makes mistake and the writer started to list out a few inaccurate information just to highlight that if others do makes mistakes so it’s ok for he/she to do so. I guess this is a common thing happened in local environment. When somebody starts pointing out your mistakes, we start to drag other people too and we will explore other people history saying that hey he/she used to do it.. so it’s ok if I do it man. Derghhh! Actually, thing is simple like I say before sorry seems to be the hardest word but yet the best solution. So say it out! that's is. With that i rest my case!

2003-09-02T10:14:00.000+08:00

I spend my early Monday holiday watching the movie. Despite being obsessed with sword and pirates movie and of course the actor, I find this movie well.. sort of GREATTTTTTTTT! I was kind of shock to find out that the football girl from Bend It Like Beckham , KEIRA KNIGHTLEY, is the Elizabeth swan in the movie. Hey how a movie can transform you! Johnny Depp hmm…He looks really cute with that pirate’s outfit. And Legolas (ORLANDO BLOOM) from the LOTR is the Will Turner; a pirate son and blacksmith! hmmm.. Labu sorry your legolas is now blacksmith!

Overall, I like the sword-fighting scene between Johnny Depp and Legolas; Johnny Depp and Geofrey Rush fighting scene; the eye popping pirate and of course when Johnny Depp and Legolas trying to steal the ship. With a touch of humor, love, pirates-like , ship movie and 17th century movie ; I could not stop watching the movie. Despite I hate the translation which made me confused I like the movie best. May be I’m somehow being influence by the actor, actress and sword movie, well I think this movie is great and WOW!
So why not join me spare a few second to enjoy my favourite lines from the Pirates of the Caribbean:
BARBOSSA: So what now, Jack Sparrow? Are we to be two immortals, locked in epic battle until the trumpets of Judgment Day?
JACK: Or you could surrender.
(He shoves Barbossa back, out of the moonlight. Barbossa stalks the room, his attention focused on Jack.)
BARBOSSA: Or I could chain you to a cannonball and drop you in the deepest part of the ocean, where you can contemplate your folly forever.
BARBOSSA: Hah. Ten years you carried that pistol, and you end up wasting your shot.
WILL: He didn't waste it.

Just a point to highlight .. who ever our parents is or who we used to be we are still the master for our destiny. A pirates son may never be a pirate! We should work out to be what we want to belive in and ignore the fact that destiny is something beyond our control but we still have hope to sort things out and be a different person!

pa

2003-09-01T22:41:00.000+08:00

Wonderful Lunch!

First of all I'm sorry to all of you for being late. Just can't stop watching the movie! . Secondly, I promised next time I'll cook kacang pol for you guys! Ok?

Anyway lunch today was really awesome. With all the food, eating, talking etc? Marvelous! Love the ayam masak lemak cili api, kerabu mangga ( even though I'm still scared to eat for the food poisoning case the previous day) still I love the food. Nana you finally cook! I remember the boneless ikan goring back 4-5 years ago.:)

Nana, you look awesome with the new hair. You upgrade yourself into the roxete style. Nana I still owe you ice-cream and lunch! Waiting for you to join me in cyberjaya. Then we can spend Friday-lunch at StreetMall, ok? Sue, finally I can hear my son-in-law-to-be (rosyam will definitely pengsan) cries. Love to see both of you panic for a few second. Muahahaha!. By the way, I'm still scare to hold small baby. Wait till the baby grew like 5-6 month. I definitely can't stop playing with them. Hafiz.... I just can't stop teasing you with ahem! Just joking! Me and my big mouth! Labu.. eat and sembang. It's really great man. I will remember your question .."banyak masa kau untuk blog-blog ni?".. jangan marah ye! Najwa, I enjoy the moment when I hold aiesyah. Yup definitely! The moment when she refused aris makes me the proudest lady in that room. Mieco, going back to Ipoh visiting the lovely wife. Pian.. he got mix up dinner with lunch. Nila.. how's the kenduri? Shaf.. how's kedah?

Sometimes as we grew older and having more commitment, sharing the few hours with friends is the best moment in life. Love eating mangga with kicap. Seeing Nana holding Irfan! Aiesyah and si semut! ( I should buy the toy for my hubby then.) Watching Sue changing diapers for Irfan. What a scene. If only I could photograph the moment and share it with the whole world.

How time flies so fast! 4-5 years ago all of us were still young kid but now each of us is somebody slightly different. Anyway, Tommorow is Tuesday. Arghh! I hate going back to office. I love the holidays. So nana enjoy the MC you had!

2003-08-30T23:42:00.000+08:00

Adoption: The twisted decision

For the past few months, I personally struggle to find a solution to the twisted question; should I adopt a child? There are so many things to look into. There are tones of criteria and factors need to be considered. Yet the answer still remains unknown.

My prime concern is Am I fully ready? Being a mother is a desire that grow viciously in me everyday! However, I am being selfish if I want to adopt a child just to fulfill the desire. To be a mother is not one–day preparation. It’s a lifetime experience. It comes with lifetime obligation, care, love and responsibilities. Thus to adopt a child may have a lifetime impact on me.

Most mothers construct the basic relationship through the 9-month pregnancy. Watching the baby grow in you daily made the experience an unforgettable moment. On top of that the first cry from your own child will definitely give you the best feeling being a mom! Yup it is something nice that I draw in the fantasy mind everyday! Thus, deciding to be a mother without having to go through the 9-month pregnancy and Not experiencing the transition moment from a pregnant woman into a mother, will I myself emotionally ready to be a mother to the child I adopt? On top of that, if my so-called wild desire to be a mother fulfilled, will I be able to portray the mother image for the child? Most women developed the 9-month mind and emotional preparation but I may take shorter period than that. Could I accept such sudden notice?

Next, do I have everything to offer for a child to be part of the family? Do I have the sufficient love for the child if one day my destiny says I will have a child of my own? Could I treat the child just like another member of the family or somebody not? Will I be fair enough to not to hurt the child feeling when I had my own child?

Another factor to be considered is time. Most of the people I refer to will respond in similar manner; it’s still too early to adopt a child. Try to go for another solution. After a certain period of time and finally all existing solution failed, Adoption is the answer. But the question is how Long? I don’t want to have baby when I’m 35. I want to see my child wedding ceremony and to be with them when I’m going to have my first grandchild. And to experience all this I need to have a child now not at the age 35 or 40.

The next issue that concern me is the child personal Hunt! When the adopted child known their status, later the child will start the journey to trace their own parents. How will I accept the journey as something normal? Could the child live to know he/she have 2-mothers? Will I lost the only child I had? No matter how much I love the child I am still not the child mother. It’s not me who had the 9-months experience. The experience is not mine! The most important issue is.. MY DNA IS NO MATCH AT ALL WITH THE CHILD! I had nothing common to the child except for my love and care. Am I ready if one day the child will leave me to be with his/her own mother? That is something that make the decision is something undecided.

Until this exact moment, I’m still lost! Should I or should I not adopt a child? To be a mother is something I really want to but being a mother may not as easy as I picture them in my mind. What if fail? What if I fail to fulfill the trust that the biological mother had for me? What if…

Finally, I’m back to my first question.. should I or should I not?

2003-08-29T11:28:00.000+08:00

SI PENDAYUNG KEAMANAN
Dalam aku menongkah arus keamanan
Membelah kesunyian subuh yang tenang
Mendayung dengan kudrat kepercayaan dan cintakan kedamaian
Melawan ganas ombak tekanan
Sesekali mengelak batu-batu kuasa kuku besi komplot tertingi
Aku masih lagi mendayung
Dari hanya anak sungai
Kini mengahampiri muara
Aku masih mencari
Dimanakah hujungnya pencarianku ini?

Wahai seluruh alam maya
Bangunlah setiap unsur bumi ini
Dari hanya butir-butir debu
Hingga ke pohon jati kukuh berdiri
Lihatlah sekelilingmu
Aku ini hanya seorang pendayung kerdil
Aku cuma mahukan
kedamaian dalam setiap dayunganku
ketenangan dalam setiap nafasku
Dan kau si pohon jati
Jangankan kerana dirimu kukuh berdiri
Kau boleh merebah diri meranapkan sampanku ini
Hei! Si jati… kau jangan lupa
Walaupun akarmu kuat mencengkam bumi
Aku tidak gentar
Aku masih yakin dengan diriku ini
Aku akan masih berjuang demi secebis ketenangan
Walaupun aku kini bebas mendayung
Aku tahu masih ada yang mahu melemaskanku
Walaupun aku kini tidak di bawah arus diktatormu..
Aku tahu ombak prejudis pasti mahu menghayutkanku

Hei.. petualang alam…
Kalau andainya aku dilambung badai kezaliman
Dan sekalipun nyawaku disiat-siat buaya keganasan
Dan jika isteri anakku kau perkosa sebuasnya…
Dengarlah inilah amanatku..
Kau boleh merampas segala yang aku miliki
Kau boleh menyedut setiap titisan darahku
Tapi Ingat !!!!
Kau tidak boleh merampas azamku
Kau tidak boleh membunuh janjiku
Dan jika hari ini sampanku musnah
Aku pasti esok beribu lagi pendayung kecil akan lahir
Kerana aku yakin
Demi… Secebis keamanan dan kebebesan
Kami akan bangkit demi
Melawan kekejaman
Kami akan terus mendayung
Menebus setiap darah yang mengalir
Dan jangan ingat kerana kami ini kerdil orangnya
Semangat kami cetek
Kami hidup kerana semangat
Dan kami mati demi kesucian keazaman

Dan jika aku pergi jua hari ini…
Doaku akan mengiringi seribu sampan yang lain…
Dan suatu hari nanti dari anak sungai hingga ke lautan luas..
Tiada lagi kezaliman
Tiada lagi kekejaman
Tiada lagi pencerobohan

Aku masih lagi mendayung…

~Kampung Girl~
~August 29,2003~
~11:00 AM~

2003-08-28T15:55:00.000+08:00

Smallville and Superman series!

Superman or Superboy series had been my favourite show! It's not about the superhuman or about the Louise Lane relationship. It's the series that caught my attention! But today Smallville is the best. Even though the series are basically the same; about an alien who had been raised by a human couple and grew up to be supernatural human helping the world (not the world actually only the town); I found Smallville is slightly nicer.

Having the so-called supernatural power, Clark Kent in superman or Superboy strives to help others that need his assistance. Saving the people in the city, He began creating the city as the best place to live in and on top of that make all the people in town just love him more. What a good life he had! Being the normal journalist still his life wasn't that bad.

As in Smallville, we watch the life he had was not that great after all. The relationship with Lex Luther, The life being Clark Kent parents and the sacrifice they've made, and more. How life either being a superhero or normal perosn is actually not that much different. With great power it comes with great responsibilities. Seeing how being the so-called great powerful teenager, he had to make a great effort to be a normal human. How he had to hide his secret part of life in order to join the circle friend he had? How Lex Luther life being rich and ignored by one man that he had; his father? How the Clark Kent secret will one day kill the relationship he had with Lex? So many questions and so much answer. In this show, we see Life remains Life! No matter who you are Life will never been that easy. We had to work hard and accept the fact that to succeed in life face every challenge for there always something in you that made you are the qualify person for the test.

Finally:

Pete: You're such a liar.
Clark: What do you mean?
Pete: I saw you and your dad driving away from my shed last night. All night long I kept telling myself there's got to be some sort of logical explanation, Clark Kent would never do anything like this.
Pete: And all these years I used to think you were my best friend.
Pete: Wait till Chloe hears about this. I can already see the headlines: "The Real Clark Kent Exposed"
Clark: Pete, we have to talk.
Pete: So you're some sort of..what? You're not a human?
Clark: I don't know what I am. I don't know where that ship brought me from. I just know that I grew up in Smallville and everything that I care about and everyone that I care about is here.
Pete: If you cared about me so much, why didn't you tell me sooner?
Clark: Pete, believe me, there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't want to tell you but my parents thought it would be too dangerous ? not just for me but for anyone else who knew the truth.
Pete: You didn't think I could handle it?
Clark: Can you? [pause; Pete circles Clark, looking at him] Pete another reason why I didn't say anything is because I knew that people would look at me the exact same way that you're looking at me now.
Pete: And how's that?
Clark: Like a freak. Pete, I've tried my whole life just to blend in, to try to be more normal than anyone else. Would you just say something. Call me- call me an alien. Call me a monster. I don't care ? just say something.
Pete: It's like I don't even know you.
Clark: Yes you do know me. I'm the same kid that used to camp in your backyard. We used to ride our bikes in the woods. We used to play basketball with your brothers. Nothing has changed.

Personal

2003-08-28T10:41:00.000+08:00

My trip to Terengannu
The 1-day trip is a tiring journey, as I had to wake up very early yesterday to catch my 730 flights and spend 4 hours at the Terengganu airport to get my flight back to KL last night. Not to mention the 4 hours journey from KT to Bandar al-Mukhtafi Bilal Shah back and forth.

However one of the highlights that catch my attention while spending the 4 hours waiting for my night flight is about this lady who supposed to take the 555PM flight but somehow she left her most important bag in the car. Unfortunately, the car had left the airport when she realise about the bag. So the airport was suddenly became very alive as this lady was requesting for the plane to wait another 5 minutes. When she got the bag, she was like 60 second late. Again the incident makes my 4-hours waiting not to boring.

The next thing that caught my attention was about this kids (around 4-10 years old) who was sleeping as I was having my little adventure in the airport. These kids were having nice, deep sleep. Since I got tired I took a seat not too far away from these kid. Then I decide to read the book I’ve been trying to read for the past 3 month suddenly I heard something fell down on the floor. One of the kids fell down. The kid was so silence until a few second later when he was like fully awake and cried. The security man really got angry as he already warn that the kid may fell but the fellow who supposed to look after these children were like somewhere and perhaps ignore the warn. why don't you let this kid slept in the car at first palce?

The next thing that amuse me was when I’m supposed to give the security man for my boarding ticket instead I gave him one of the pamphlet I pick up in the airport. Sorry! I was so tired yesterday.
SM:” Awak bagi saya apa ni? Awak nak balik ke nak buat promotion? ”
KG: “Sorry!”

Then I got my wish which is to feel a slight bumpy plane-ride. Since last night I guess the rain made the flight journey felt a little bit shaking here and there. Nice journey man.

What makes my trip great was when I stroll down the path from the plane to the arrival gate and admiring the beautiful airport and finally saw my husband waiting for me. Arghh! Finally, my one tiring day ends. Then both of us took dinner at burger King! Marvellous

personal

2003-08-26T01:28:00.000+08:00

My notes for you!

In my life I tend to forget the most valuable thing I had is you. ! I used to not appreciate the existing few years’ relationship we share. The relationship we had is simple but yet different. Knowing you and having this wonderful relationship with you, I sometimes started to act a little bit overacting for not appreciating you. I used to compare you for something that you don’t have. I used to feel depress, as my expectation for you is totally different. However, years pass, we still remain together till this specific moment facing every challenge together.

Time had seen how we share joy and laughter. How we really made each other laugh in a way that other people don’t understands. Our joke is a funny statement we share together. Only us! Our laughter resembles the enjoyable moment we had together.

An action of fight does sometimes come between us. How we do hurt each other but still after every fight, I felt this relationship is a unique bond we had.

There are times when I get really confused as I evaluate you for things you don’t have. Comparing you with others that I thought is the best model for you hurts you. Sorry for not appreciating you for being yourself. At the end I realize, there something about you that made me think.. What ever happened, it is you that I want to be with.

I may not the best Juliet in this world, still I felt lucky to have the chance to be with you. I may not always be there all this year to be with you, stand by you and listen for every word you said, still, you remain strong with me. Never give up to make my life a wonderful piece of everlasting joy.

Knowing you in the greenish and blue shirt boy, I used to not aware about you. But as time flies, the chance we had to spent time together made us closer each day. Thank you for the wonderful time I had with you all this while. Most important of all, thank you very much for making my life as your wife is the best thing that had ever happened to me. Thank you abang!

miscellanous

2003-08-24T23:54:00.000+08:00

Gilmore Girls : Rory Speach
Nice Speach. Love it!

" Headmaster Charleston, faculty members, fellow students, family and friends, welcome. We never thought this day would come. We prayed for its quick delivery, crossed days off our calendars, counted hours, minutes, and seconds, and now that it's here, I'm sorry it is because it means leaving friends who inspire me and teachers who have been my mentors - so many people who have shaped my life and my fellow students' lives impermeably and forever. I live in two worlds. One is a world of books. I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatawpha County, hunted the white whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina, and strolled down Swann's Way. It's a rewarding world, but my second one is by far superior. My second one is populated with characters slightly less eccentric but supremely real, made of flesh and bone, full of love, who are my ultimate inspiration for everything. Richard and Emily Gilmore are kind, decent, unfailingly generous people. They are my twin pillars without whom I could not stand. I am proud to be their grandchild. But my ultimate inspiration comes from my best friend, the dazzling woman from whom I received my name and my life's blood, Lorelai Gilmore.

My mother never gave me any idea that I couldn't do whatever I wanted to do or be whomever I wanted to be. She filled our house with love and fun and books and music, unflagging in her efforts to give me role models from Jane Austen to Eudora Welty to Patti Smith. As she guided me through these incredible eighteen years, I don't know if she ever realized that the person I most wanted to be was her.

Thank you, Mom. You are my guidepost for everything. "

I just wish one day my own child may appreciate me for being a woman in their life, a mother and a friend to share things with. I just wish!!

personal notes

2003-08-24T21:29:00.000+08:00

Is it wrong for a guy to cry?

Throughout the years Man had been known as strong figure. Thus, being shadowed by the powerful image, it is expected for them to act as strong as Hercules. Thus when a man cry, it is unacceptable. Why? The answer is simple. Crying is synonym to a woman. Being categorized as woman behavior, crying is something unacceptable for a man. So typical.

I was reading newspaper this evening when I happened to read in the gossip column regarding a male singer who cried for his love failure. And the writer nearly cried when she heard such love failure (I don’t actually care what the love story is!). Then suddenly the writer started to laugh because she realize the singer is a MALE! She thought the male singer is not being tough because he cried. Then she started to compare the artist with the Afghan, Palestine and Iraq man who join the army to fight for the dignity of their country and still these armies don’t cry. On top of that, being the so-called ‘Man doesn’t cry’ believer, she categorized the male singer behavior as funny. What kind of person she is? As for me, the writer is not being sensitive!

Frankly speaking there’s nothing wrong for a man to cry. Even if we thought the reason is so not important, to cry is still ok for me. Crying is not a woman-own feature but it’s a human capability. Thus I believe when a man cry, he’s just being normal. Thus, when a man cries, it’s not that he’s no longer the Hercules anymore but he’s just being a human. Since being a human we need to respond to our environment. Furthermore, responding to the environment around us is important as it projects our personal stand in a specific situation. However, if to cry and being human is something wrong for a man… that there’s nothing else I can say since my people still believe.. MEN DON’T CRY even for tiny reason (no reason is tiny.. That’s what I thought. )

personal notes

2003-08-23T11:34:00.000+08:00

THE POWER OF WORD

I was browsing some of my favorite blogs earlier and some new ones, suddenly I had this thought in my mind “how wonderful words can be?” Digesting every single word in every blog I read, putting the picture about each character of the words in my mind, I felt like a completely new person! Seeing thing from the eye of words; having this soft touch from every word; creating a fantasy reality the word draw in mind make me realize…The powers of words…Undeniable

Every word is a weapon itself. In every word, it holds every element of power that every human need to survive in this jungle of life. This is not a fantasy I create but a real painting of life that was drawn by words….

Decades of year had proven that the power of words had killed the strongest man of the century. Thousand of years had witnessed that the power of word require the greatest sacrifice from every lover in this world. And how the first word make you mom cry. Word…. sound simple but strong.
Using the powerful force of the ‘influence words’, the politician gain their power! Using the destructive power of a word, a country lost their sacred land. Manipulating the seduce word, we betray the loyal ones.
Enjoying the sweet chat of comfort word, we create a shoulder to cry on. Assisting the word of frustration with the expression of hopes, we closed the road for loser. Whispering the word of happiness, the tears of sadness just dry out.

Every word may sound simple to your ears but every word is complicated blend of the alphabet. Every word may seem helpless by itself but a strong power when it comes to the power of sentence. Every word may means nothing to you but it may not be to others. So, remember choose your word nicely for every word lies a hidden power.

2003-08-22T15:15:00.000+08:00

Something to read!

I got this from a friend of mine, najwa. Thank you for such wonderful notes!!! love it

How to be a valuable employee in your company.

1. Never walk without a document in your hands

People with documents in their hands look like
hardworking employees heading for important meetings.
People with nothing in their hands look like they're
heading for the canteen. People with a newspaper in
their hand look like they're heading for the toilet.
Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home
with you at night, thus generating the false
impression that you work longer hours than you do.

2. Use computers to look busy

Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to
the casual observer. You can send and receive
personal e-mail, chat and generally have a blast
without doing anything remotely related to work. These
aren't exactly the societal benefits that the
proponents of the computer revolution would like to
talk about but they're not bad either. When you get
caught by your boss - and you *will* get caught --
your best defense is to claim you're teaching yourself
to use new software, thus saving valuable training
expenses.

3. Messy desk

Top management can get away with a clean desk. For
the rest of us, it looks like we're not working hard
enough. Build huge piles of documents around your
workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks the
same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile
them high and wide. If you know somebody is coming to
your desk, bury the document you'll need halfway down
in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she
arrives.

4. Voice Mail

Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People
don't call you just because they want to give you
something for nothing - they call because they want
YOU to do work for THEM. That's no way to live. Screen
all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves
a voice mail message for you and it sounds like
impending work, respond during lunch hour when you
know they're not there - it looks like you're
hardworking and conscientious even though you're being
a devious weasel.

5. Looking Impatient and Annoyed

Always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your
bosses the impression that you are always busy.

6. Leave the office late

Always leave the office late, especially when the boss
is still around. You could read magazines and
storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no
time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk
past the boss' room on your way out. Send important
emails at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc.)
and during public holidays.

7. Creative Sighing for Effect

Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving
the impression that you are under extreme pressure.

8. Stacking Strategy

It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the
table. Put lots of books on the floor etc. (thick
computer manuals are the best).

9. Build Vocabulary

Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all
the jargon and new products. Use the phrases freely
when in conversation with bosses. Remember: They don't
have to understand what you say, but you will sound
impressive.

10. Have 2 Jackets

If you work in a big open plan office, always leave a
spare jacket draped over the back of your seat. This
gives the impression that you are still on the
premises. The second jacket should be worn while
swanning around elsewhere

11. MOST IMPORTANT:

DON'T forward this email to your boss by mistake ...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!